Posted by kittencat on July 17, 2004, at 11:11:32
I'm still a fairly new member, but haven't checked in in at least a month. I am desperate.
The crushing, agonizing pain of depression...I can't get a reprieve. No one understands. Everyone means well...if I get a few moments of anxiety-induced "up-ness", they are satisfied & go away, thinking I am better. I'm not better. I've reached out all I can reach out.
I'm so alone. I made the mistake of saying "suicide" to a friend years ago, & got slapped with a seventy-two hour hold in a county mental health facility for the uninsured. I'll never forget that experience. That is NOT what I need.
I feel worthless, hopeless, depondent & panicked. I can't stop crying & feeling all this grief. No medicine ever works well enough, or long enough for me. Why am I here?
I just want it all to go away. I'm so unhappy...it permeates every cell of my being. It hurts so bad...
Can anyone share experiences? Can anyone help me stay alive?? Or tell me why I should?
poster:kittencat
thread:367118
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20040714/msgs/367118.html