Posted by juanantoniod on January 30, 2003, at 20:06:20
Amy,
I don’t mind answering your questions. I haven’t been on the Depakote long enough to figure out what it’s doing for me. It does seem to let me sleep a little later in the morning. This is helpful because it fills up more of my day so I don’t feel so depressed. The Focalin is a short-acting stimulant which I use if I take it later in the day so it doesn’t interfere with sleep. The Concerta is taken in the morning if I need to be alert all day. I don’t believe that I am on 2 benzos, and the Ativan is a relatively low dose (I think). I would like to get off medications altogether, but that does not seem likely any time in the near future. Also, psychiatry isn’t geared toward reducing medication, it’s more about piling on as many as possible.
I’ve been in psychotherapy for years. I believe that I’ve grieved as much as I can for the loss of my friend. The people close to me are helping as much as they can.
I agree with you about doing something part-time having a positive effect on your state of mind. I’m planning on doing some volunteer work to help me get ready for the structure of a work environment. I’m thinking that I can help somewhere with computers, since that is what I am good at. I am in California as well, so I know about the vocational rehab program. What ideas do you have for the goal you want to pursue through the program?
I'm sorry I did not get back to you sooner, I've been under the weather with a cold for the last few days.
Antonio
> Antonio,
> It's good that the Depakote is allowing you to nap during the day. Do you feel incredibly groggy once you wake up? It did that to me, I had a real hard time getting up in the morning.
>
> I'm wondering, why two stimulants and two benzo's?
>
> Do you think you should try to cut out some? I've heard that too much BZs can make you depressed.
>
> You asked about my returning to work. I have been on disability for a year and a half and I'm thinking that some kind of part time work might actually have a positive effect on my state of mind. I need some kind of structure. Right now I'm in vocational rehab. which in California, is available to anyone who has any kind of disability. Their funding is being cut in June, so I need to figure out something to get training in before that
>
> What kind of volunteer work are you going to do?
>
> I sincerely hope you get on the right meds. As for your real feelings, have you spent any time in psycotherapy? After the death of your best friend have you allowed yourself to properly grieve? Do you have anyone close to you who can help you?
> Just to let you know, your death would have an impact on me as well, because even though I'm just getting to know you, it would make me feel hopeless too. I am reading a book on Buddhist meditation right now, and he says that we need to be thankful for all the obstacles and problems in our lives because without them we are completely sterile, cleaned out with Ajax, like hospital corridors where there's no place for germs. Our problems are the only working basis that we have. Regared them as a promise. We should be grateful that we are not sterile and cleaned out. THis might not make sense, I think it's really important to first get on the right meds.
> Please try not to entertain the thought of death. Do not reinforce it in any way, tell those thought to stop. You don't need to believe your thoughts.
> Antonio, I hope I'm not being pushy, I really am helping myself through you. I do care what happens to you. If I am intruding to much let me know.
> Amy
poster:juanantoniod
thread:137244
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030130/msgs/138446.html