Posted by Phil on January 5, 2000, at 8:28:16
In reply to my particular obsession (longish), posted by CarolAnn on January 5, 2000, at 7:53:18
CarolAnn, In recovery circles, it's called peeling away the layers of an onion. You fix surface things and then you go deeper.
I don't think this is codep. Codep is putting others needs ahead of your own and sometimes, many times?, can be totally to your detriment.
My Mother was alcoholic and I ALWAYS was trying to figure out how to help, please, fix her problem. I was over 30, in therapy, when I realized I wasn't taking care of MYSELF! I had no earthly idea what I NEEDED and still, to this day, have to work on figuring out my needs. I want to be liked also but it doesn't matter as much as it once did. I think now, I would rather have my voice heard and not just say anything just to 'get along'. It has taken me a long time to get there. Wanting everyone to like you is VERY HARD WORK.
Phil
poster:Phil
thread:18076
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20000101/msgs/18081.html