Posted by Lori on October 10, 1999, at 1:34:49
In reply to This must be hard to watch..., posted by Sara Ann on October 9, 1999, at 0:24:13
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> There's another issue here, that you don't say that your daughter is asking for your help. I think that offering advice in those circumstances could hurt your relationship with her. If she is depressed she needs all the support she can get. Maybe the best thing to do is listen and offer to help her explore other treatment modalities if this one doesn't work for her.
Sara Ann-Great insight! In the past my daughter did ask for my help - usually when she was at her lowest. Her plea was usually made in anger saying "Why haven't you done anything to help me?". Since she has started seeing this therapist, she no longer asks. I think you are absolutely right that what she needs right now is someone just to listen. That has been a hard lesson for me to learn.
My son, who has had a very difficult time understanding his sister's illness (by the way he is 2 1/2 years older and has not lived at home since High School), is now in training to volunteer his time on a suicide hotline. One of the first instructions he received was not to offer suggestions to the caller in an effort to help, but simply listen and show empathy. I have to work harder at developing that skill -- and not offer advice when she doesn't ask for it.
Thanks so much for your insight :o)
Lori
poster:Lori
thread:12619
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/19991016/msgs/12943.html