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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by rainyday on March 29, 2004, at 19:03:12
Sorry, my question mark looks like this
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but I find that this forum is the ONLY place I socialize in. Where else can you find people with similar problems, can empathize with side effects, etc.
I tried to go to an AA meeting today after work. I only drink when I am alone and my spouse is out of town. It is sporadic and I do not look forward to these periods. When he is home I feel neither the need nor the desire to drink. I can handle life, such as it is.I walked in - it reeked of cigarette smoke.
I asked for a local meeting list, and before I was out the door,
I was crying.These are not my people.
I looked for a non-smoking meeting in my COUNTY and there are none.I do not believe that I have to take up smoking to join the club.
I drink to deaden the pain of being alone, and of hurting. The people I saw this afternoon were pretty much dragged in off the street. The only thing missing from the scenery was the bar! I would never have caught myself dead in one of these places, even in my most, finest, alcoholic hours. I am no better than they, but
I do not smoke
I do not flirtThat is what they seem to do at these meetings, no matter WHAT the purpose is.
TThis experiece was the same I saw when I lived hundreds of miles north, when I felt I did not fit in. I am not a fisherman. I am not a heroin addict, I do not belong there either. I have not contemplated suicide because it looks like it takes too much thinking and planning.
Only in THIS PLACE do I find ANYONE to talk to who can relate. Am I anti-social or what....
I feel like I belong anywhere but here.
Posted by lonelygirl on March 29, 2004, at 20:58:04
In reply to Is this IT for a social life, posted by rainyday on March 29, 2004, at 19:03:12
I feel for you... I do not fit in anywhere. I don't have any friends at all. I have tried joining organizations at school, doing volunteer work, etc., but I always feel like I do not fit in. Even at my church, I have attended "college night" (social events for college students who attend the church), and everyone just ignored me. I mean, you would think that at a CHURCH there would be some people kind enough to talk to a loser, but they're just like everyone else, I guess.
I like the internet because people don't have to see what I look like. Pretty much my only connection to the world is through e-mail groups, message boards, and LiveJournal, but the REALLY sad part is that I don't even fit in on the internet! I only have two LiveJournal "friends" and they rarely even read my entries. Most of the time when I post on message boards, people ignore me. I used to post on healthboards sometimes, but I never got a single response to any of the few questions I ever asked! I also used to post on a message board at the unofficial web site for my school, but then they started having parties and since I didn't go, I wasn't in the "clique" so they started ignoring me, too.
Or maybe it's just because I ramble on and on like I am now.
Posted by lonelygirl on March 29, 2004, at 21:10:33
In reply to Is this IT for a social life, posted by rainyday on March 29, 2004, at 19:03:12
P.S. I get so lonely when nobody posts. If I am gone in class for 3 hours and I come back and there are only 2 new posts, I get all upset and wonder what the heck is going on, and where is everyone??? I am also always disappointed when I get up in the morning and there are hardly any new posts, in th 6 or 7 hours since I last checked! I guess it is too bad that other people here actually have lives.
Posted by jay on March 29, 2004, at 21:22:36
In reply to Is this IT for a social life, posted by rainyday on March 29, 2004, at 19:03:12
I know it is painful to feel so *alone*. Damn, it’s just unfair. Try finding more resources in your community. Even phone your local hospital and ask to talk to a crisis counsellor. There are often a few different support groups besides AA/NA, one suitable for different people. Even a casual, non-AA related group is nice, even if you don’t say anything, because you are around people, and you really know you are not *alone*. Eeven go through the phone book, and try calling a few different numbers.
I had no idea there where 5 different support groups in my small town (non-AA), and plan on taking advantage of them.I wish the best for ya...and please keep posting.
Best,
Jay
Posted by rainyday on March 30, 2004, at 7:18:25
In reply to Lonely, posted by lonelygirl on March 29, 2004, at 21:10:33
> P.S. I get so lonely when nobody posts. If I am gone in class for 3 hours and I come back and there are only 2 new posts, I get all upset and wonder what the heck is going on, and where is everyone??? I am also always disappointed when I get up in the morning and there are hardly any new posts, in th 6 or 7 hours since I last checked! I guess it is too bad that other people here actually have lives.
I feel that way too! I am on the computer from 7:30am until 4:30pm so I quite often check to see what's going on here.I am pretty impressed with all the pharmacological knowledge on the main board. Can't understand any of it, but impressed. OK, OK, intimidated is the right word.
I see my p-doc this afternoon about my medications. I am going to see what groups she knows of I might be able to join and perhaps fit in.
jay & lonelygirl - thanks for your posts
Posted by TexasChic on March 31, 2004, at 12:42:52
In reply to Lonely, posted by lonelygirl on March 29, 2004, at 21:10:33
I understand and feel the same. My therapist always suggests the same thing over and over: church groups. She knows good and well that I had church shoved down my throat growing up by a control freak of a father who was also a preacher (and mentally unstable). You were expected never to question anything – doubting was a sin. It was such a cult. When I realized there was a whole other world out there, I made my choice and never looked back.
I think everyone should be entitled to their own beliefs without persecution. I have nothing but respect for people who have found their place with religion. I just wish more people felt the same about my non-religious beliefs. The worst part is when someone questions my morals. I usually reply, "So you only refrain from killing people because your church tells you to?"
Anyway, I didn't mean to go on a tangent. I've just been disturbed about this alot lately. But back to wanting to meet people. My first step will be moving out of my Grandmother's house. I've been her caregiver for 6 years and now my mom is going to take over. So my life has been on hold for a while. My therapist is afraid I may isolate myself once I move out (I have in the past), but I told her I'm ready to do whatever it takes.
I think its especially difficult being a 34 year old single woman. Most people my age are married. And since I really don't want to meet people in bars, I'm going to have to get creative. I think first off I'm going to do something for me, like taking a sculpture or painting class. Then at least I'll have a more creative outlet to pass the time, rather than feeling sorry for myself.
So I'll let you know if I discover any secret ways to meet people. Good luck to yall as well!
Posted by TexasChic on March 31, 2004, at 13:05:33
In reply to Re: Lonely, posted by TexasChic on March 31, 2004, at 12:42:52
I just reread my post and thought it might be taken as insulting to some, but that is not at all what I intended. Please forgive me if it did.
Posted by Dr. Bob on April 1, 2004, at 18:39:37
In reply to Re: PS to above, posted by TexasChic on March 31, 2004, at 13:05:33
This is the end of the thread.
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