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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 8 of 8. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by ClearSkies on February 22, 2006, at 10:09:44
No happy face to turn toward the world. Neutral, slightly glum, slightly worried expression. Preoccupied. This is the face I wear today.
No trigger, no special reason for the depression to appear. It happens, I am letting it happen. I am not fighting its appearance. For the moment, it's a part of me.Sleeping a lot. Having nonsense dreams. Feeling weighty, like I'd sink to the bottom of a pond, if I was a stone. Even my vision stays close to the ground when I am like this. Gazing at the sky feels too hopeful an exercise.
Just being a lump. Keeping my world small. Digesting what I've seen. Wellness will return in its own time. I am not pulling it in or pushing towards it. It'll happen, just as this depression has happened.
ClearSkies
Posted by Dinah on February 22, 2006, at 10:13:58
In reply to Allowing myself to feel depressed, posted by ClearSkies on February 22, 2006, at 10:09:44
I'm sorry you're feeling depressed, but I'm so impressed with your attitude. I remember feeling that before with your new acceptance of your moods. Do you feel confident that this too shall pass?
Posted by B2chica on February 22, 2006, at 10:29:44
In reply to Allowing myself to feel depressed, posted by ClearSkies on February 22, 2006, at 10:09:44
((((((clearskies))))))))
sorry you are getting these feelings, but i agree with Dinah in that you are doing very well to accept the feelings and let them go through you. i promise it won't last forever.hang on to me if you need to.
be gentle to yourself if you can. do some self-soothing things.
cares
b2c.
Posted by ClearSkies on February 22, 2006, at 10:44:47
In reply to Re: Allowing myself to feel depressed » ClearSkies, posted by Dinah on February 22, 2006, at 10:13:58
Yes, it will pass. I think that when I go on a trip like I did, I quash all my problems aside so I can experience what's going on around me. Then when I get back to my safe place at home, it all has to decompress and be allowed to happen.
It feels like it wants to roll around and wallow for a while, then it will slither away. If my depression could be visualized as an animal, it might be a three-toed sloth. Although they are too cute to be "depression".
I have Zoo on the Brain still.
Posted by ClearSkies on February 22, 2006, at 10:46:20
In reply to Re: Allowing myself to feel depressed, posted by B2chica on February 22, 2006, at 10:29:44
> hang on to me if you need to.
>Thanks. That feels good. Company is nice.
> be gentle to yourself if you can. do some self-soothing things.
> cares
> b2c.I might think about painting my toenails, but they are awfully far away today. We'll see.
CS
Posted by Sabrina0805 on February 22, 2006, at 11:49:36
In reply to Allowing myself to feel depressed, posted by ClearSkies on February 22, 2006, at 10:09:44
ClearSkies - you are doing the healthiest thing possible. And I thought I was reading about me. Made me feel less alone.
Yes, wellness will return in its own time. Until then keep safe, BE safe, nuture yourself. I will be thinking of you.
Sabrina
Posted by gardenergirl on February 22, 2006, at 15:18:59
In reply to Re: Allowing myself to feel depressed » ClearSkies, posted by Sabrina0805 on February 22, 2006, at 11:49:36
That sounds like a really good way to cope with it. I know I get very angry, frustrated, and more depressed when another episode comes on. I'm starting to realize that along with it comes some buried shame that I "should" be able to prevent them by now. (ha!)
So accepting and knowing it will pass....that does sound "cleaner" somehow. And easier.
I hope it passes soon. And I shall try to adopt that attitude, too, to see what it feels like.
Thanks for sharing it.
gg
Posted by Daisym on February 23, 2006, at 0:21:14
In reply to Allowing myself to feel depressed, posted by ClearSkies on February 22, 2006, at 10:09:44
I've gone quiet in myself this week, just waiting for this painful period to pass. I'm not as open and accepting as you are, I'll try to use you as my role model. It hurts more to struggle against it anyway, doesn't it?
I'm impressed with your growth.
Hugs,
Daisy
This is the end of the thread.
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