Psycho-Babble Psychology Thread 313273

Shown: posts 1 to 14 of 14. This is the beginning of the thread.

 

Just want to share the good stuff

Posted by All Done on February 14, 2004, at 14:07:30

Today, I had an appointment with my therapist/Valentine for hire ;).

We were discussing my feeling that I do a lot of worrying about other people, but I don't think others (ahem, my T) worry or think about me much. Without me directly asking him if he thinks about me outside of our therapy hour, he told me he does. He then proceeded to list several things he likes about me and our work together. I hate that I can't and will probably never remember the exact words that he used, but I love that I will always remember how those words made me feel.

I told him that was a very nice Valentine's gift he gave me and we talked a bit about how that "gift" made me feel. We ended today's session on such a nice note and I just wanted to share my warm and fuzzy feelings with all of you.

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff

Posted by Karen_kay on February 14, 2004, at 14:36:39

In reply to Just want to share the good stuff, posted by All Done on February 14, 2004, at 14:07:30

That's wonderful!!! Happy Valentine's Day to you!

I always worried that Bubba never once thought about me ever, but I never had the nerve to broach the subject. But once during a session, he said something like, "You know I was at home thinking about your situation and it occured to me...." I was thrilled!!!! They do think about us every once in a while! How great is that???

I don't think about Bubba nearly as much as I used to. Maybe I'm jsut preparing myself for termination? Or maybe I'm just developing a more healthy attachment? I'll never know...

 

What a nice session. I'm glad. (nm)

Posted by gardenergirl on February 14, 2004, at 15:44:55

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff, posted by Karen_kay on February 14, 2004, at 14:36:39

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done

Posted by Crooked Heart on February 14, 2004, at 16:34:50

In reply to Just want to share the good stuff, posted by All Done on February 14, 2004, at 14:07:30

Warm and fuzzy feelings duly received, thanks very much!

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done

Posted by Poet on February 14, 2004, at 17:41:28

In reply to Just want to share the good stuff, posted by All Done on February 14, 2004, at 14:07:30

Hi All Done,

What a great session on anyday, but on Valentine's Day to feel warm and fuzzy, that's even better.

Happy Heart Day

Poet

 

Re: That's wonderful! I love the good stuff. :) » All Done

Posted by Dinah on February 14, 2004, at 18:59:22

In reply to Just want to share the good stuff, posted by All Done on February 14, 2004, at 14:07:30

And warm fuzzies are my favorite.

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done

Posted by terrics on February 14, 2004, at 19:11:42

In reply to Just want to share the good stuff, posted by All Done on February 14, 2004, at 14:07:30

Happy for you! terrics

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Karen_kay

Posted by All Done on February 15, 2004, at 1:09:47

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff, posted by Karen_kay on February 14, 2004, at 14:36:39

> That's wonderful!!! Happy Valentine's Day to you!

Happy Valentine's Day to you too, Karen! I hope the Present Fairy was good to you. Any diamonds?


> I don't think about Bubba nearly as much as I used to. Maybe I'm jsut preparing myself for termination? Or maybe I'm just developing a more healthy attachment? I'll never know...

I know what you mean. I even talked with Beefcake about that today. Once I had shared with him my transference feelings toward him they suddenly stopped. I told him today that I miss those thoughts and feelings. When I was having them, it felt good because I was experiencing feelings and emotions that I hadn't experienced is quite some time. It made me hopeful that I can make progress and get away from feeling blah all of the time. Not to mention some of the thoughts were just plain fun ;)!

Hmm, sorry, where was I going with this? Well, Beefcake thinks maybe the feelings went away because I became afraid of them (afraid of intimacy, trusting him, just plain afraid of experiencing these somewhat foreign emotions?) I just don't know. I do know I've been keeping him at arms length for a while. Today's session was different, though. Maybe things will change.

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done

Posted by Karen_kay on February 15, 2004, at 20:12:58

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Karen_kay, posted by All Done on February 15, 2004, at 1:09:47

Diamonds, blah! I only get diamonds for Christmas. It's a rule of sorts. I did get roses and dinner. He got a card and well... Anyway.. :) (Is it bad if I was thinking of someone else??? Ok, enough "girl talk")


I REALLY miss those feelings... Especially "the crush"!!! Oh, how my heart would beat extra fast when he walked into the waiting room. Now it does, but out of pure dread! Just kidding of course. I don't even have "indecent thoughts" about him anymore :( I try but it's just YUCKY! Honestly. I don't know, something's changed. It's not that I dislike him in anyway, I just don't see "IT" anymore... I sound like some silly school girl, don't I? Please tell me someone else sounds like a silly school girl too...

But, I'd stil marry him. Just for stability and security. But, in all honesty, I think he's rather cheap. And I'm not so it wouldn't work out. Maybe his brother? I'm not looking for love,you know. I'm looking for stability! Eureeka, I've found my problem! I don't believe in love! (But, is that a bad thing I ask you or is that realistic? Hmmm...)

I just don't understand why they encourage clients to get "emotionally attached" so they can be let down. I realize of course the purpose, but I still think it's a crock! I'm not happy with the thought of the first person I become attached to up and dumping me! I just don't like it!

I keep thinking "What would Bubba do if...." I tried to sit on his lap, I tried to hug him, I tried to touch his leg, ect... Of course I may try some of the smaller things. And I would only do these things to get a reaction out of him, to see how he handled the situation. Is this because I want to see if I can trust him? I always try to play men, and I think it's because I'm scared they're going to play me first. And I'm quite convinced he's not as smart as I thought he was to begin with. And I still don't like his wife. Just because she gets in my way of "playing therapy" (How stupid is that line of thought???).. But, I seem to think if she wasn't in the picture, then I may be able to "play therapy" more often. Now, I've lost my train of thought... Maybe I just don't like women in general? Or maybe I just like married men? Or maybe I don't like married women? *Or maybe I'm jealous of married women? Hmmm.. that may be it?*


I'm glad your session was so good! It's wonderful to have a great session and walk out feeling all warm and toasty inside, isn't it? I just love those sessions. Our 1 year anniversary is coming up soon, in a little over a month. Funny, I thought it was in February but I checked my old planner and I wrote down the first date and it's March 21, the first day of Spring.... I doubt he remembers, and I doubt even more that he thinks I remember. Which I wouldn't except I still have my old planner. I'm starting to plan what to take in.... Maybe banana nut bread?


 

(((((Karen Kay)))))

Posted by Dinah on February 15, 2004, at 21:18:36

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done, posted by Karen_kay on February 15, 2004, at 20:12:58

I don't suppose you'd give me Bubba's phone number? I have a few choice words for him.

Not that I don't think you're capable of delivering a few choice words yourself. :)

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Karen_kay

Posted by Elle2021 on February 15, 2004, at 22:19:39

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done, posted by Karen_kay on February 15, 2004, at 20:12:58

>I'm looking for stability! Eureeka, I've found my problem! I don't believe in love! (But, is that a bad thing I ask you or is that realistic?

I would take stability over love also. I have told my psychiatrist that before, he didn't think it was all that weird of me to say.

>Maybe I just don't like women in general?

I don't really trust women. My pdoc said it might have something to do with the relationship betweem me and my mother.

>Or maybe I just like married men?

Could be because the married men are "safe." You know that they are already married and so they can't really expect anything from you.

>Or maybe I don't like married women? *Or maybe I'm jealous of married women? Hmmm.. that may be it?*

I'm jealous of the happily married ones. :(

Elle

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Elle2021

Posted by DaisyM on February 15, 2004, at 23:05:27

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Karen_kay, posted by Elle2021 on February 15, 2004, at 22:19:39

I am jealous of the really happily married ones too...
I taught lamaze classes for years. Every once in awhile you would see a couple who was so connected, so obviously in love with each other, that it made you ache. I am a realist about what living long term with someone means but occasionally there are wistful thoughts of romantic love...*sigh*

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Karen_kay

Posted by fallsfall on February 16, 2004, at 7:10:46

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done, posted by Karen_kay on February 15, 2004, at 20:12:58

Karen,

I celebrated my therapy anniversary (Jan 23) with my first therapist every year for 8 years. She had good enough taste to like chocolate, so it was easy to please us both. Sometimes I brought in cupcakes, but in the later years I would bring in Boston Creme Donuts from Dunkin' Donuts - the ones with the chocolate on the top. I usually decorated the top of whatever it was with little candies or that squeeze icing to show the number of the year.

She wasn't sure about it the first year, but decided that since I brought one for each of us that it was a party, not a gift. Then each year after that I'd walk in with a box and she'd say "Is it that time again, already?". If I didn't have anything pressing to talk about we would use the session to reminisce, or talk about progress or goals.

My new anniversary isn't until June - so I still have some time to plan.

Please let us know how you and Bubba celebrate!

 

Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Karen_kay

Posted by All Done on February 17, 2004, at 1:27:50

In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff » All Done, posted by Karen_kay on February 15, 2004, at 20:12:58

>I REALLY miss those feelings... Especially "the crush"!!! Oh, how my heart would beat extra fast when he walked into the waiting room. Now it does, but out of pure dread! Just kidding of course. I don't even have "indecent thoughts" about him anymore :( I try but it's just YUCKY! Honestly. I don't know, something's changed. It's not that I dislike him in anyway, I just don't see "IT" anymore... I sound like some silly school girl, don't I? Please tell me someone else sounds like a silly school girl too...

If this is silly school girl thinking, I must be in 7th grade or something...

I told Beefcake that I miss the crush and I want to know how to get it back. He didn't tell me. Maybe if he would leave his shirt unbuttoned more often... ; )


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