Posted by Karen_kay on February 15, 2004, at 20:12:58
In reply to Re: Just want to share the good stuff » Karen_kay, posted by All Done on February 15, 2004, at 1:09:47
Diamonds, blah! I only get diamonds for Christmas. It's a rule of sorts. I did get roses and dinner. He got a card and well... Anyway.. :) (Is it bad if I was thinking of someone else??? Ok, enough "girl talk")
I REALLY miss those feelings... Especially "the crush"!!! Oh, how my heart would beat extra fast when he walked into the waiting room. Now it does, but out of pure dread! Just kidding of course. I don't even have "indecent thoughts" about him anymore :( I try but it's just YUCKY! Honestly. I don't know, something's changed. It's not that I dislike him in anyway, I just don't see "IT" anymore... I sound like some silly school girl, don't I? Please tell me someone else sounds like a silly school girl too...But, I'd stil marry him. Just for stability and security. But, in all honesty, I think he's rather cheap. And I'm not so it wouldn't work out. Maybe his brother? I'm not looking for love,you know. I'm looking for stability! Eureeka, I've found my problem! I don't believe in love! (But, is that a bad thing I ask you or is that realistic? Hmmm...)
I just don't understand why they encourage clients to get "emotionally attached" so they can be let down. I realize of course the purpose, but I still think it's a crock! I'm not happy with the thought of the first person I become attached to up and dumping me! I just don't like it!
I keep thinking "What would Bubba do if...." I tried to sit on his lap, I tried to hug him, I tried to touch his leg, ect... Of course I may try some of the smaller things. And I would only do these things to get a reaction out of him, to see how he handled the situation. Is this because I want to see if I can trust him? I always try to play men, and I think it's because I'm scared they're going to play me first. And I'm quite convinced he's not as smart as I thought he was to begin with. And I still don't like his wife. Just because she gets in my way of "playing therapy" (How stupid is that line of thought???).. But, I seem to think if she wasn't in the picture, then I may be able to "play therapy" more often. Now, I've lost my train of thought... Maybe I just don't like women in general? Or maybe I just like married men? Or maybe I don't like married women? *Or maybe I'm jealous of married women? Hmmm.. that may be it?*
I'm glad your session was so good! It's wonderful to have a great session and walk out feeling all warm and toasty inside, isn't it? I just love those sessions. Our 1 year anniversary is coming up soon, in a little over a month. Funny, I thought it was in February but I checked my old planner and I wrote down the first date and it's March 21, the first day of Spring.... I doubt he remembers, and I doubt even more that he thinks I remember. Which I wouldn't except I still have my old planner. I'm starting to plan what to take in.... Maybe banana nut bread?
poster:Karen_kay
thread:313273
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040211/msgs/313801.html