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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 10 of 10. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 22, 2014, at 12:11:23
there's nothing big right now in my life besiddes school, and my gf....but still i have to say i drive myself crazy and torment in worry because things don't work out the way i want them, or try to change something that won't change....
does anyone know whats the best way to get away from worry? i've already tried faith and scripture....htey don't really sink in, because when i have faith it doesnt work
anyone have a good remedy for worry and the nerves?
Posted by Twinleaf on January 22, 2014, at 13:40:36
In reply to worry driving me crazy, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 22, 2014, at 12:11:23
In tough moments like these, remember the wonderful things you have already accomplished compared to a few years ago - school, girlfriend, developing goals. Those are just wonderful!
As to the anxiety, what about safe things which lower stress hormones: exercise, meditation, deep breathing, and also perhaps herbs like rhodiola rosea and amino acids like phosphadatylserine? You could do one of the saliva cortisol tests and see where your levels are before and after you start these things which are known to lower cortisol. Because excess stress hormones are connected to depression, you would be treating both anxiety and depression in a safe manner. What do you think - worth a try?
Posted by 10derheart on January 22, 2014, at 17:01:35
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy » rjlockhart37, posted by Twinleaf on January 22, 2014, at 13:40:36
M,
I think Twinleaf has wonderful ideas - hope you take her post to heart. And, if your mind reacts like mine (ADD) to many, many options, you may tend to be overwhelmed and then freeze or give up 'cause making that executive decision of which one to try, when, how...it's all just too much. So...be aware that might be happening and maybe may your gf can help organize a small plan with baby steps?
Pick one at a time and try it for one week? Then you can see what helps?
I do understand. For me Matthew 6:25
http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+6%3A25-34&version=NIV
makes so much sense, and is incredibly helpful, yet, to live that way consistently is sooooooooooo hard. Helps me to do a couple things...
---to repeat to myself that God is in control and whatever the "worry of the moment" is He will handle (AND remind yourself at the same time most things NEVER actually happen or are as bad as we imagine....)
----also I use the "so what?" exercise I learned years ago in a group....just focus on a situation like having to go to a public, group setting and feeling anxious and think of each thing that you worry about. Examples:
"People will look at me funny if I say the wrong thing"
[So what? Funny looks don't last. AND I could be imagining them, AND even if true, do funny looks harm me, really?]
"I won't be able to explain myself"
[So what? Can't I try again? Can every person on earth explain themselves well, first time, every time? Could I take someone with me to help explain? ....etc....]
"I'll feel bad/embarrassed/stupid/humiliated/hurt."
[So what? Yeah, I might, BUT...really, so what? Feelings pass. Does any feeling state last literally forever without changing? Will I die from these emotions? Am I not still here, still trying, when I've felt those *many* times before? Yup. Huh. Sooo they must not be that terribly threatening... I survive them!]
Make it like a game, especially if you and someone safe - like your gf - can do this out loud like we did in group. We usually ended up laughing because it helps you realize your worries are MUCH tinier than you thought and even if you keep saying, "yeah, but still..." IF you follow with "So What?" it helps to give perspective that most of these things either won't happen or when they do, are so unimportant i the scheme of your life, a year, a month or even your day, you can chuckle at yourself for spending brain power on them!
It helped me tremendously to practice this all the time. "So what?" became a powerful phrase. Even with huge things....
"But I will never find a job!"
SW?
"I won't have any money"
SW?
"I can't pay my bills!"
SW?
"I'll become homeless!"
Okay....not "so what?" there (because yes, that happens in a small subset of cases...) but this is where the reality (or absurdity) comes in if you have ANY resources at all: family, gf, friends, gov't assistance, whatever....others would HELP YOU not become homeless. The idea being that even the worst isn't equal to the "I'm Going to Die From It!!!" reactions many of we anxiety-prone folks apply to initial problems, reflexively, and convince ourselves they are true, true, true.
Don't know if I explained that well, but it's stuck with me and keeps helping me after a decade (first learned this in 2004) and so I know it can be an excellent tool. Not for everything, not for all MH problems, but for the worrying that is so automatic and makes sense to us, but might need challenging...
YMMV, I know, and I know it's really tough, but I KNOW you can do it. Keep going, keep posting, and like TL said, you have come FAR!!
Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 22, 2014, at 19:47:15
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy » rjlockhart37, posted by Twinleaf on January 22, 2014, at 13:40:36
excerise i've been doing sometimes, i do mostly cardio, to get a personal trainer would be good, sometimes i don't want to keep up and fed with working out
the only thing that could be something is low thyorid, maybe get that checked out
thanks
r
Posted by baseball55 on January 22, 2014, at 20:14:51
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 22, 2014, at 19:47:15
RJ - Do you see a therapist? I always feel, from your posts, that you are looking for a biological solution to a psychological problem.
Posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2014, at 21:36:51
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy » rjlockhart37, posted by baseball55 on January 22, 2014, at 20:14:51
maybe someone behaviorally oriented. do task. get reward. get praise. accomplishment! progress! feel pride! way to go! get slightly harder task. get reward. rinse, repeat. progress. accomplishment. yay!!!
Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 23, 2014, at 13:14:44
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy, posted by 10derheart on January 22, 2014, at 17:01:35
thanks, matthew is my favorite book in the bible, my real name is matthew, but don't tell anyone LOL they already know it, people know who i am aleadly because my name is attached to rjlockhart in the google feeds....
god is good, lately i have been reading about jesus christ, and his healing, supernatural healing, and realize that it is real, and that God is there...no matter what is being an obstacle, he can solve it.
the only thing with caring for what people think of me, one time i was with some friends and we went to a bar just one time, i got a bit drunk, but this man came up to me, and he asked me questions, i couldnt understand anything he was saying, he looked at me and started laughing and his wife laughed too...and one time i was with a freind, i posted about this before, i smoked marajuana and it made me dissociate, the lady that gave me it, she sat me down and told me to talk to her so i wouldnt pass out, the hate in her eyes was like so intense, she wouldnt let me watch tv, i just went into the bathroom and locked for 2 hours, she hated me, the reason probaly is she thought i would have to go the hospita and she would get into trouble at the large amount of marajuna she had in her house.....it's those experinces that stay with me, there's many more of people laughing at me....but you know, leave it behind, it doesnt matter, it's just a memory that can be forgotten, and move on to new....
i read your last paragraph, the only way to stop worse sitations from happening, such as being homeless, is to act, and i say that, but i don't really think that deeply, and i have to apply that to overcome this grey gloomy trapped way of living....thank you 10tendeart i really appricate your concern, but don't be overly concerned about me, like i said i don't want to be a energy drainer to people, it's my own life that is simple problems....no more SOS posts, but i always post my feelings here on babble....there just like a blog....
thank you 10tender
r
Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 23, 2014, at 13:16:12
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy » rjlockhart37, posted by baseball55 on January 22, 2014, at 20:14:51
yes i see a couslor but it's difficlt because he can't really relate, and i realized the only counselor i need is myself to do things, and god....as much boo hoo i've done, i can solve things on my own....
thanks
Posted by rjlockhart37 on January 23, 2014, at 13:17:32
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy, posted by alexandra_k on January 22, 2014, at 21:36:51
goal system....yes, it's effective....think do, solve, get reward, achieve....
nothing better than success
r
Posted by baseball55 on January 23, 2014, at 20:08:05
In reply to Re: worry driving me crazy, posted by rjlockhart37 on January 23, 2014, at 13:17:32
Rj - I sent a reply to an earlier thread. Think I should have sent it here. Check the earlier thread.
This is the end of the thread.
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