Shown: posts 37 to 61 of 61. Go back in thread:
Posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 18:56:32
In reply to Re: My decision! :) For Susan too!, posted by caraher on June 25, 2005, at 10:24:12
Once again, if you're not talking about me I'm toast.
Because I really love putting stuff down, stuff I can really let my head get into, and then sometimes my body follows, and it's fab-u-lous, absolutely fabulous. God. Okay, the one time I would actually believe there is a God, would be that ultimate sexual experience with the ultimate person.. the one you really want to be with, the person you've wanted to touch, to caress with your eyes, for so long, the person you've just wanted to be alone with, that's all. The only.
Oh, my. The orchid speaks again.
You know, one person can have a lot of different voices. I like that.
Posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 19:40:47
In reply to You would never know !!! » happyflower, posted by pinkeye on June 23, 2005, at 17:02:12
That was beautifully put, about the bandwidth, it's a pretty accurate description of the amount of attention they can give to any one person. Like all of us, there's a lot of other stuff in our heads too. I'd suspect more so with a thinking therapist. I think it's important for a therapist to be happy with himself and his life, really very interested in his own life, but not to the exclusion of having a bit of extra time to think things through, you know ... it's a balancing act, I'm pretty sure of that. I bet sometimes they get a bit topheavy, and teeter, and maybe need a bit of help, because they have to stay emotionally stable, that's their big priority I suppose, or at least I think it should be, for everybody. It's a gift, it really is.
I fell in love with this man, and I feel really kind of silly. It's embarrassing, because love isn't supposed to have a "silly" string attached. But this one does, from all the people that have said, "Oh, that's Classic." It makes it feel like I'm being judged for being in love with someone, when I really do love this person, I love what I know of this person, or what I feel to be true about this person. I love the feeling, too, it fills me up and makes me feel full of joy. Enjoy, did you know that word means In the state of joy? En- is within. Within joy. So when somebody tells you to enjoy something, you're really getting a wonderful wish for yourself.
I don't think we should feel bad about being attracted to somebody, no matter who it is... maybe if this woman's therapist admitted his own feelings, well if he looks at himself and has them, he wouldn't feel pressured when she talks about sex. If he has fantasies, that's great, it's fine, but he has to get all his needs met before he walks into that room with a client because otherwise he's put a block there, something there's no way the client can work around. Sounds like happyflower's therapist has to figure out why he's uncomfortable around her, no matter what it is, even if it's something that's Not good, he has to deal with it and get it out of the way, Happyflower you have to be able to talk to him.. tell him about the faces he's making, try to get him to see that he's giving you some reactions you're having a hard time dealing with.
Posted by happyflower on June 26, 2005, at 20:08:17
In reply to Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too » pinkeye, posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 19:40:47
Thanks Susan,
You make a lot of sense to me. I do think I will ask him about his reactions when I talk about sex. I am sure this subject will come up again. I think he fine talking about sex in general, but when it comes to me talking about my sex drive it seems to affect him in some wierd way. I think if he is attracted to me, and he is still a man, even if he is a T, a T still has a penis if you know what I mean.lol Thanks for your input Susan! :)
Posted by caraher on June 26, 2005, at 20:14:47
In reply to Re: My decision! :) For Susan too! » happyflower, posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 18:47:06
> But I'm no writer. Who here is a writer? Calling all writers.. how do you learn to write??? Without actually taking the course.. it can't be done, can it.
You're not hearing us... you have a wonderful talent of expression that comes from within. I could take a million classes and never come up with what you do. You're already a writer; you just need an editor, practice and the decision to do it (not necessarily in that order ;) )
Posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 21:51:31
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too » Susan47, posted by happyflower on June 26, 2005, at 20:08:17
....absolutely the loveliest penis ... sigh.
Here comes a rant,
I can't help it,
sorry.
Y'know, there's not many people out there who can do it for me, I wish there were. I need to get excited about someone real. It's just so bloody hard, it doesn't come easily to trust and desire and lust and feel really good things about wanting to be with a particular person.. it's just ridiculous that therapists get paid for people to feel this way about them. It's just no fun, unrequited desire, unrequited lust, I Hate the feeling sometimes, it's so FRUSTRATING, Life Is Too Bloody Short for This Sh*t. How can anybody stand it??? I would never ever ever choose to see a male therapist again, that I was immediately attracted to. It would just be stupid. It's torture, it's absolute hell and I hate it.
Posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 21:55:42
In reply to Re: My decision! :) For Susan too!, posted by caraher on June 26, 2005, at 20:14:47
D'you know what?
There is absolutely a method to writing.
I don't know what it is.
First of all, a story needs to be told.
So, you have to have a story.
Do you have one? I'm not sure I'd know how to tell mine.
I might do better just to keep .. hmm... straggling along, like this,
making myself happy when I can, working during the day and getting my compensation from being with sick people who need my help. I like that. And then there's a lot of smart people around there, caring smart people ... also lots of potential friends, I love that. But writing is difficult, when it doesn't come from your heart. To write you really honestly have to have an open heart. There's just no other way to do it.
But then you also have to have the method.
Not just the "way with words", you know, but the ability to tell the story from beginning to end, so that it has meaning all the way through, it excites the reader and then resolves. It's like an orgasm, really, same structure. Ooops.
Posted by happyflower on June 26, 2005, at 21:57:48
In reply to Yes, he does have one, and quite I'm sure it's, posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 21:51:31
Susan, it is okay to rant, no need to say you are sorry. I am comfortable with it, if you want to babble mail me, if you are not comforable with it, I don't mind.
I think a lot of people want what they can't have. It is natural thing, desire, . Even though my husband has been a butt lately, he taught me that love can happen. I see so many unhappy marriages out there, I think love will happen when you learn to love yourself first.
Posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 21:59:19
In reply to Re: My decision! :) For Susan too!, posted by caraher on June 25, 2005, at 10:24:12
I may take you too seriously....hmmm. Sigh. D'you know, I've been going through this thing lately where I've been finding older men, I mean guys in their sixties and seventies, even into their eighties, I hope this doesn't sound sick or anything, but I've been seeing their sexuality, I've been feeling like they're attractive, in some ways even more than the young men. Well, really, in all ways except emancipated-looking, a lot of older people get that way, it's not good.
I'm still trying to put on my ten pounds per decade. Finally did it, I think. Pooooof, she's a marshmallow. Fills in the wrinkles.
Posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 22:04:47
In reply to Re: My decision! :) (followed by personal ramble), posted by caraher on June 24, 2005, at 11:52:02
I can't believe you said that, I can't believe you said that horrible monster bit, because that's how I've felt most of my life too. It hurts, it actually hurts to hear you speak that way about yourself, that feeling you have is so wrong, so untrue. You just haven't seen your true self yet. When you do you'll see how gorgeous you really are, and how others see and reflect what you're feeling about yourself. It's amazing, you're absolutely gorgeous just from the way you communicate, you know. I can tell you have a lot to offer people.
Posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:09:15
In reply to Re: My decision! :) For Susan too! » happyflower, posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 18:51:51
> I did Madagascar with my son, it's not really my thing but he loved it, I'm glad I took him. There wasn't enough adult humour in it to satisfy me, I guess. But there were quite a few good laughs.
Lava Girl... was SO lame! I tried to nap during the movie, but I couldn't. What was funny was that they had places in it called the "stream of consciousness", and oh....I can't remember the other stuff, that was pretty funny. The 3D effects were NOT good, but the boys liked it, so....
Jazzy
Posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:10:53
In reply to Re: My decision! :) For Susan too! » Jazzed, posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 18:50:15
Yep, you, when you talk about sex, sometimes it's just so erotic! I"m not into women at all, but the men out there have to notice too!
Jazzy
Posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:19:52
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too » Susan47, posted by happyflower on June 26, 2005, at 20:08:17
> Thanks Susan,
> You make a lot of sense to me. I do think I will ask him about his reactions when I talk about sex. I am sure this subject will come up again.Hey Happy,
I hope you make it come up. It's your session, he's your T, he should be able to talk about your feelings about sex. I already know mine will be just fine with it, cause it's already come up, and he wanted me to "tell me more...."
LOL Yeah, I bet you want me to "tell you more"! LOL Well, at least I know it'll be an okay topic!I fully intend to talk about SEX tonight in my appt! Last night my husband came home, after being gone ALL weekend - you know 3 days w/o SEX!
Anyway, when he'd gotten settled, and was sitting on the couch, I came and sat on his lap, facing him, and started kissing him, and saying things to him, and running my fingers through his hair. And, what did he do?! He laughed at me!!! He actually laughed at me! At first it was okay, and then I asked him something erotic, and he laughed and said, "Yes, you still do. I have to go to bed." Like, I'm tired, not like oooo, baby I gotta have you. I was pissed!
He knew he'd made a big mistake! Oh well, so it's gonna come up tonight, unless we don't get to it, I have a million questions to ask him.Jazzy
Posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:21:51
In reply to Re: My decision! :) For Susan too!, posted by caraher on June 26, 2005, at 20:14:47
> > But I'm no writer. Who here is a writer? Calling all writers.. how do you learn to write??? Without actually taking the course.. it can't be done, can it.
>
> You're not hearing us... you have a wonderful talent of expression that comes from within. I could take a million classes and never come up with what you do. You're already a writer; you just need an editor, practice and the decision to do it (not necessarily in that order ;) )The Harlequin Romance Novel web site has an online course for learning how to write romance novels. It's a blow by blow, no pun intended, course. Might give a look see.
Jazzy
Posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:24:59
In reply to And BTW, Caraher, You Ought to Be Careful » caraher, posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 21:59:19
> I've been going through this thing lately where I've been finding older men, I mean guys in their sixties and seventies, even into their eighties, I hope this doesn't sound sick or anything, but I've been seeing their sexuality,
Not sick, I don't know how old you are, but there are guys in their 50's and 60's I find very attractive, and am sexually attracted to them. Not 80's mind you, that's just too old for me, but hey, it worked for Anna Nicole Smith, now didn't it?!
Jazzy
Posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 7:32:21
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too » happyflower, posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:19:52
> >
> Hey Happy,
>
> I hope you make it come up. It's your session, he's your T, he should be able to talk about your feelings about sex. I already know mine will be just fine with it, cause it's already come up, and he wanted me to "tell me more...."SOunds like a come on to me! lol Oh, baby, tell me more you sweet Jazzy Smazzy! And a horney Jazzy needs some and well , maybe you better talk about something else, or else that same shirt he always wears will start to look good to you! lol
I am still sure what his reactions are when I talk about sex, maybe I am reading him wrong. I guess I won't know until I confront him about it.But my next session I need to talk about more inportant stuff like my butt of a husband and he doesn't know yet that I have started to play my trumpet again. He will be surprised because he was encouraging it, and I said no way!
> LOL Yeah, I bet you want me to "tell you more"! LOL Well, at least I know it'll be an okay topic!
>
> I fully intend to talk about SEX tonight in my appt! Last night my husband came home, after being gone ALL weekend - you know 3 days w/o SEX!So sorry, Jazzy, I know how that feels. I didn't get any this weekend either! But my husband was home!
I am glad you are pumped up for your session tonight! Good Luck, and keep your clothes on, and let us know how it goes. Knowing you Jazzy, I bet your T will look away! lol Or if he didn't before, he sure will now! lol :)
Posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 7:42:52
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too, posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 7:32:21
Posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:45:00
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too, posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 7:32:21
>
> SOunds like a come on to me! lol Oh, baby, tell me more you sweet Jazzy Smazzy!
You know happy, it LOOKED and sounded like a come on to me too. It was funny! BUT, I wouldn't go into that, I wasn't expecting to have to give details, so I was totally taken off guard. Tonight I'm going to tell him about my hubby's problems with verbalizing, and also about last night. BUT, it's his problem with verbalizing not mine, so I don't think it will benefit me to tell him explicit details, who knows?!>And a horney Jazzy needs some and well , maybe you better talk about something else, or else that same shirt he always wears will start to look good to you! lol
The shirt doesn't have to look good if the man can deliver! LOL JK! OMGosh, happy, you really get me going!
> I am still sure what his reactions are when I talk about sex, maybe I am reading him wrong. I guess I won't know until I confront him about it.
I can't wait to know what's going on in his head! When are you going to talk with him about it?
>
> But my next session I need to talk about more inportant stuff like my butt of a husband and he doesn't know yet that I have started to play my trumpet again. He will be surprised because he was encouraging it, and I said no way!He hasn't heard you play yet?! Where's the man been?! I'm so sorry he's been a butt! I wish you had an awesome hubby and MIL! I can't remember, is your T married? I thought you said he was, but now I'm wondering........
> So sorry, Jazzy, I know how that feels. I didn't get any this weekend either! But my husband was home!I know too, when things are not going well, you just don't feel like initiating sex.
>
> I am glad you are pumped up for your session tonight! Good Luck, and keep your clothes on, and let us know how it goes. Knowing you Jazzy, I bet your T will look away! lol Or if he didn't before, he sure will now! lol :)At first when I read that, I read pimped instead of pumped! LOL I will have no trouble keeping my clothes on, for goodness sakes, I don't want to scare the man! I don't think he'll look away happy. I get the impression he's very comfortable with the topic, and will be just fine with discussing it if he thinks it's relevent. I'm not sure it is.
Jazzy
do you have babble mail? I don't, but I might have to get it, esp. if you have it! ; )
Posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 8:07:11
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too » happyflower, posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 7:45:00
>
> >> The shirt doesn't have to look good if the man can deliver! LOL JK! OMGosh, happy, you really get me going!Ha Ha! I KNEW it, Jazzy has a thing for her T now! lol :)
>
> I can't wait to know what's going on in his head! When are you going to talk with him about it?Which one are you talking about? lol I don't know when to bring this up because I have so much to talk about. I am ready for it, if we get into it again. We might, because my and DH are having problems, and well I am not getting any.
>I can't remember, is your T married? I thought you said he was, but now I'm wondering........Well here is the big mystery, he doesn't wear a ring but he does refer to his wife has "his wife". So I don't know if he is separated, or he just doesn't wear a ring. Is it common for a married man not to wear a ring? I am almost sure he lives with her because how did his wife and daugher eat my cupcake in the fridge? I really don't feel like prying into his private life, I would like to know but, what would it matter anyways? lol :0
I just started to play again 1 week ago, and I haven't seen my T for almost 2 weeks. I see him this Wed. I sure miss his smiling face!
> I know too, when things are not going well, you just don't feel like initiating sex.Oh, I have but he won't do it and when things aren't going well on the outside, it sometimes effect a man performance if ya know what I mean.
> At first when I read that, I read pimped instead of pumped!We all know where your mind is! lol
LOL I will have no trouble keeping my clothes on, for goodness sakes, I don't want to scare the man! I don't think he'll look away happy. I get the impression he's very comfortable with the topic, and will be just fine with discussing it if he thinks it's relevent. I'm not sure it is.
I am sure he will make it relevent! lol He knows when he has a hot women accross from him! lol
>
> do you have babble mail? I don't, but I might have to get it, esp. if you have it! ; )I think you can change it somewhere on this site. I would love to babble mail you. :)
>
>
Posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 8:10:09
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too, posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 8:07:11
Posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 8:25:25
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too, posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 8:07:11
>
> Ha Ha! I KNEW it, Jazzy has a thing for her T now! lol :)No, not yet, don't know if I ever will. He's not hot or anything, but that's okay. I love to talk, and he's a good talker. My husband and I don't talk, talk, you know have meaningful conversation much. I'd like that with someone.
>
>
> Which one are you talking about? lol I don't know when to bring this up because I have so much to talk about. I am ready for it, if we get into it again. We might, because my and DH are having problems, and well I am not getting any.I'm talking about your T! Well, if you're not getting any, then I'd say that needs to be dealt with, and I'm sure your T will be very insightful! I do hope he can help.....in whatever way works best!
>
> Well here is the big mystery, he doesn't wear a ring but he does refer to his wife has "his wife". So I don't know if he is separated, or he just doesn't wear a ring. Is it common for a married man not to wear a ring?Maybe he's allergic to metal? Maybe it's the blank slate thing? My p-doc doesn't wear one either, haven't checked my T's hand. Will do that tonight. He's also referred to "his wife". G! I'd just die if he ever read my stuff!
>>I would like to know but, what would it matter anyways? lol :0
Ya never know, do you?!
>
> I just started to play again 1 week ago, and I haven't seen my T for almost 2 weeks. I see him this Wed. I sure miss his smiling face!I remember when you started playing again. You go girl!
>
> Oh, I have but he won't do it and when things aren't going well on the outside, it sometimes effect a man performance if ya know what I mean.
>
My husband will initiate if we've been arguing, it's me that holds a grudge. Sometimes he has performance probs. if I want it every night.> We all know where your mind is! lol
Yep! ; )
>
>
> I am sure he will make it relevent! lol He knows when he has a hot women accross from him! lol
>
Oh, not hot, trust me! I wish!> I think you can change it somewhere on this site. I would love to babble mail you. :)
I think we do it on Admin. Will look later, gotta go get the baby up, he's yelling for me!
Jazzy
> >
> >
>
>
Posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 8:38:26
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too » happyflower, posted by Jazzed on June 27, 2005, at 8:25:25
> >
> > Ha Ha! I KNEW it, Jazzy has a thing for her T now! lol :)
>
> No, not yet, don't know if I ever will. He's not hot or anything, but that's okay. I love to talk, and he's a good talker. My husband and I don't talk, talk, you know have meaningful conversation much. I'd like that with someone.Sounds like a good begining to me! lol My T isn't "hot", but he is nice looking, better than average, but not "hot". His personality is "hot" though! lol
I'm talking about your T! Well, if you're not getting any, then I'd say that needs to be dealt with, and I'm sure your T will be very insightful! I do hope he can help.....in whatever way works best!You are too funny! Do you have any suggestions? lol
> Maybe he's allergic to metal? Maybe it's the blank slate thing? My p-doc doesn't wear one either, haven't checked my T's hand. Will do that tonight. He's also referred to "his wife". G! I'd just die if he ever read my stuff!I didn't think about the allergic think, I guess I was hoping for something else! lol I think if it was the blank slate thing, he wouldn't mention his wife. Who knows?
> >>I would like to know but, what would it matter anyways? lol :0
>
> Ya never know, do you?!
LOL!
>
> I remember when you started playing again. You go girl!Yeah, now that I am playing the "horn" again, I am just too horny! lol Maybe I should say that to my T. Well, Doc, I have been just so horny this week! lol Now that would be funny, he would probably just turn red! lol
>
> > I am sure he will make it relevent! lol He knows when he has a hot women accross from him! lol
> Oh, not hot, trust me! I wish!ANY women who is wanting it, is hot to a guy, they can pick up on that stuff! lol Better be careful tonight!
> > > >
Posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 8:41:42
In reply to Re: Changing topic a sec, and Happyflower too, posted by happyflower on June 27, 2005, at 8:38:26
Posted by caraher on June 27, 2005, at 12:57:45
In reply to Re: My decision! :) (followed by personal ramble) » caraher, posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 22:04:47
> I can't believe you said that, I can't believe you said that horrible monster bit, because that's how I've felt most of my life too. It hurts, it actually hurts to hear you speak that way about yourself, that feeling you have is so wrong, so untrue. You just haven't seen your true self yet. When you do you'll see how gorgeous you really are, and how others see and reflect what you're feeling about yourself. It's amazing, you're absolutely gorgeous just from the way you communicate, you know. I can tell you have a lot to offer people.
You're too kind... *blushes*. Yeah, I do know I should at least just give others the chance to make up their own minds about me rather than operating on the assumption of rejection. I'm actually a lot better about that now. :)
And you do know you're no monster either, right? Far from it... your candor is refreshing and your ability to express your inner life is exceptional.
Posted by Susan47 on July 1, 2005, at 12:48:44
In reply to Re: My decision! :) (followed by personal ramble), posted by caraher on June 27, 2005, at 12:57:45
I love it when you say stuff like that. The ability to express your inner life.. it's a dream come true. So fierce the knowing that this is what I mean to do with my life, this part of it's so rewarding. Talking to people too, having people change before your eyes, the satisfaction I feel when I believe I've had a good effect on an attitude or a negative feeling someone's had.
Babble's good because it gives me a chance to read people. Everybody here is bringing themselves to the table. I'm learning some compassion and understanding. I get annoyed quite a bit too, like a lot of us I'll bet. But in the end I understand people much better than I ever did before. And it's good, it's very very good. I'm able to be less ashamed of my inability to change things for the better, for others.
Yesterday a woman broke down sobbing, her gp had frightened her terribly with something he'd said. There were two of us there, and the other girl is a beautiful person, I love her very much already, she's frail and delicate, but very unsure of herself. Same age, but she has so much to offer that isn't being offered because she's held back. For the first time I was able to feel confident in my ability to be a positive for someone.. and I did the right thing. The woman felt better. Here she'd been, getting the images from the lab or the doctor, bringing them in to her specialist, hoping to talk about the next step of her treatment, she's taking charge, so she feels better and the fear's assuaged a bit by her action. Then she gets deadlocked, the dr. isn't in, isn't even answering her pages right now, she's attending to some other emergency. And the girl with me, you know, she's sitting there and saying "Sorry..." and looking blankly at this woman, and the phone's ringing, and she looks at the phone as though she wants to pick it up, and back to the woman in distress, and the woman is breaking into tears now, she's telling us how upset she is, and the girl sitting beside me feels terrible. She's frozen by her own distress, her inability to do something that will make this better, she's afraid she isn't up to the job. But she is, you know, she's beautiful she has compassion and understanding and love, but her fear's holding her back and this poor woman is absolutely dissolving into desperation. I did the right thing and she went away happy and it was LOVELY, I LOVED IT, I love my job.. I hope I keep feeling that way. Whew.
Posted by Susan47 on July 2, 2005, at 10:05:19
In reply to Re: My decision! :) (followed by personal ramble) » caraher, posted by Susan47 on July 1, 2005, at 12:48:44
The woman didn't go away Happy.. that was impossible.. why did I say that? She went away frustrated and upset, there's only so much anyone can do in a situation like that, but what happened was she felt like she mattered and wasn't going to be forgotten. That's important for everyone.
This is the end of the thread.
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