Posted by Susan47 on June 26, 2005, at 19:40:47
In reply to You would never know !!! » happyflower, posted by pinkeye on June 23, 2005, at 17:02:12
That was beautifully put, about the bandwidth, it's a pretty accurate description of the amount of attention they can give to any one person. Like all of us, there's a lot of other stuff in our heads too. I'd suspect more so with a thinking therapist. I think it's important for a therapist to be happy with himself and his life, really very interested in his own life, but not to the exclusion of having a bit of extra time to think things through, you know ... it's a balancing act, I'm pretty sure of that. I bet sometimes they get a bit topheavy, and teeter, and maybe need a bit of help, because they have to stay emotionally stable, that's their big priority I suppose, or at least I think it should be, for everybody. It's a gift, it really is.
I fell in love with this man, and I feel really kind of silly. It's embarrassing, because love isn't supposed to have a "silly" string attached. But this one does, from all the people that have said, "Oh, that's Classic." It makes it feel like I'm being judged for being in love with someone, when I really do love this person, I love what I know of this person, or what I feel to be true about this person. I love the feeling, too, it fills me up and makes me feel full of joy. Enjoy, did you know that word means In the state of joy? En- is within. Within joy. So when somebody tells you to enjoy something, you're really getting a wonderful wish for yourself.
I don't think we should feel bad about being attracted to somebody, no matter who it is... maybe if this woman's therapist admitted his own feelings, well if he looks at himself and has them, he wouldn't feel pressured when she talks about sex. If he has fantasies, that's great, it's fine, but he has to get all his needs met before he walks into that room with a client because otherwise he's put a block there, something there's no way the client can work around. Sounds like happyflower's therapist has to figure out why he's uncomfortable around her, no matter what it is, even if it's something that's Not good, he has to deal with it and get it out of the way, Happyflower you have to be able to talk to him.. tell him about the faces he's making, try to get him to see that he's giving you some reactions you're having a hard time dealing with.
poster:Susan47
thread:517585
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050622/msgs/519482.html