Shown: posts 1 to 9 of 9. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by Dena on September 4, 2003, at 10:24:19
Hello all.
This is certainly a timely new board for me. I suppose I had outposted my welcome on the Psycho Babble Faith board with my regular mentioning of my recent miscarriage.
I'd like to converse with others who have suffered a miscarriage - either recently or in the past. I'd like to hear about others' experiences with the grief that followed (or didn't). I'd also like to hear about experiences with grief in general, as I've heard that there's a rather predictable pattern in the various stages of grief.
I miscarried the second week of August of this year. (Rather than repeating myself, the "story" of my miscarriage can be found in Psycho Babble Faith: The past four weeks: good bad news Dena 8/13/03)
I'd love to hear whatever anyone has to share.
Shalom, Dena
Posted by Elle2021 on October 28, 2003, at 3:26:44
In reply to Miscarriage, posted by Dena on September 4, 2003, at 10:24:19
Dear Dena,
I'm really sorry to hear or your loss. I hope you feel better soon. God bless you.
Love, Elle
Posted by tai daluna on November 8, 2003, at 6:55:43
In reply to Miscarriage, posted by Dena on September 4, 2003, at 10:24:19
certain light
blood bright as sunset over water
emptied, i am old
as that and ashamed of this
body
that carried a certain light for weeksnow bearing another kind of loneliness
and that other wound beneath the ribs
bright as the blood, even brighterbeating anyway
---
i had a miscarriage once, when i was 18. all those bits and pieces of deconstructed feotus. i remember it vividly: i mourned the lost potential for years. now there is just a dull ache in my belly when i think about it. the baby was unexpected. i was afraid.when i lost the baby, it felt like a light had been snuffed out inside me; the desolation was almost too much to bear. i felt like a failure.
now i see the wisdom of the universe working in my body. i was far too young to bear the weight of a life. i am glad it turned out as it did. i would never, ever have been able to abort that baby on my own, but i didn't want it and i couldn't support it.
nonetheless, the moment i was pregnant i knew. i could feel it growing inside of me. i delight to think of the day when i will bear children, because i will never forget that feeling. it was the only time in my life that i felt full and not alone.
peace.
tai
Posted by judy1 on December 8, 2003, at 9:54:37
In reply to Miscarriage, posted by Dena on September 4, 2003, at 10:24:19
My heart goes out to you. I have suffered six m/c in my life, the last the loss of twins in the second trimester. I have 2 beautiful children, but I will never forget the 'angels' I lost. I doubt you will ever forget, but it does get better. I truly think only women who have lost babies understand the pain of other women. I'll be happy to listen to you ( sorry this took so long, I hardly ever check this board)
I hope you are feeling better, judy
Posted by SandraMaY on December 9, 2003, at 1:12:29
In reply to Re: Miscarriage » Dena, posted by judy1 on December 8, 2003, at 9:54:37
I recently had to terminate(not abort) a pregnancy, it is a termination because it was at 18 weeks, anything after 12 weeks isnt an abortion.
Anyways i dont know if this can relate to mis-carriage, but it seems all the people i have talked to about it have only had experience with mis-carriage, termination isnt something you hear of every day. Either way its been 6 weeks since the termination and I started on anti-depressants 2 weeks ago (efexor-xr) i would like to know how other women have coped with a loss like this. I have the regrets of whether or not it was the right thing to do, we dont yet have a post mortom report about what exactly was wrong with my 'angel'. my husband and family have been very supportive, but the only turn we could make to help me help myself was to take the drugs.
I know it hasnt been long since my loss and we did expect i would be upset, letting the hormones settle was the first excuse people use.
I also know i might seem nasty for terminating my baby, when people lose them all the time.. but the problems they picked up on ultra-sound were too much for a baby to have to put up with for a good quality of life, thats assuming it survived after a full term pregnancy & birth.
Bottom line I wanted to share my loss, and i came here to see if anyone could share my pain in the same way, other than mis-carriage.
Posted by tai daluna on December 9, 2003, at 5:49:46
In reply to Re: Miscarriage, posted by SandraMaY on December 9, 2003, at 1:12:29
sandra,
i am so sorry for your loss. you did what you had to do. take care of yourself and forgive yourself. i am thinking of you.tai
Posted by judy1 on December 9, 2003, at 9:18:13
In reply to Re: Miscarriage, posted by SandraMaY on December 9, 2003, at 1:12:29
I'm glad you're able to 'talk' about it- what a difficult thing for you to go through! You don't have to make any excuses, I'm sure you did what was right for you and your baby. And it isn't as uncommon as you think, I knew 2 women who did the same thing after the results of amnio, which unfortunately take that long. I would expect you to go through all the stages of grief, you did lose a child. If your family support isn't enough, then take advantage of support groups with women who had to make similar decisions.
take care of yourself- judy
Posted by SandraMaY on December 9, 2003, at 20:46:03
In reply to Re: Miscarriage » SandraMaY, posted by judy1 on December 9, 2003, at 9:18:13
Thankyou for your replies, mine was due to alot of things, i didnt have enough amniotic fluid, and the baby had a hole in its stomach and a tumor on its neck and plus there was a large chance from my blood test that it would have downs syndrome so it wasnt good, but if anyone is on here with the same thing, id love to talk about it.
Posted by Anti-Trust on January 7, 2004, at 16:20:17
In reply to Miscarriage, posted by Dena on September 4, 2003, at 10:24:19
I am 37 and have three healthy children but have also lost 2 children by miscarriage in the 2nd trimester. one year before my first son was born, now he is a TEENAGER!!!!!!! and two months before I conceived my youngest son, now 7 years.
I cant hardly remember my first its been so many years but i can remember detail for detail of my last miscarriage. big long story....but it hurts like HECK! emotionally and physically
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