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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 15 of 15. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 2:37:04
I was doing well after a trial of ketamine and TMS. I seemed to be ok on Lexapro, Tramadol and Ativan and was functioning.
Last week, I o'd on a bunch of pills, and I don't know if it was self sabotage, a half-hearted attempt to kill myself or a dumb attempt to feel different, but it put me in a mega tailspin and I'm struggling again. I'm my own worst enemy, and I'm too old to be doing this to myself (an upcoming birthday had me in the dumps but I just can't justify my actions). I'm severely down, depressed, hopeless and don't know where to pick up the pieces. I need to stress that I don't drink or abuse drugs, but every few months I'll "self medicate" or take a bunch of pills to alter how I feel. I know better than this.
I know I can't take any meds/ drugs other than what's prescribed and as prescribed, which is my intention, but at this point, do I finally try Nardil? I think therapy might help too. Even though I was "ok" before this happened, I still had severe anhedonia and have withdrawn from any kind of social life.
Any suggestions? I feel pretty desperate.
-b
Posted by SLS on June 27, 2013, at 7:56:32
In reply to Nardil, finally?, posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 2:37:04
> I was doing well after a trial of ketamine and TMS. I seemed to be ok
Can you describe what it was like for you to be "ok"? What, if anything, did you feel that you were missing that you should want to try Nardil?
I'm sure you know that you can't combine Nardil with either Lexapro or tramadol.
> Last week, I o'd on a bunch of pills, and I don't know if it was self sabotage, a half-hearted attempt to kill myself or a dumb attempt to feel different, but it put me in a mega tailspin and I'm struggling again.
No blame. No guilt. No judgment.
Perhaps you can learn from this. You don't necessarily have to repeat this behavior. I think it would help to be more certain as to what motivated you to do this, though.
> an upcoming birthday had me in the dumps but I just can't justify my actions
Lost time, advancing age, and a history of lack of reward and fulfillment is depressing. How can one not be depressed when he must pass time in the absence of enjoyment? Where is the joy?
Nardil is probably a better choice than Parnate when anhedonia is present along social anxiety or lack of sociability.
> I'm my own worst enemy
Join the club.
- Scott
Posted by Phillipa on June 27, 2013, at 10:01:06
In reply to Nardil, finally?, posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 2:37:04
Bryn I had no idea? I seriously thought the meds were working? I don't know what to say. Still seeing the pdoc that did the ketamine and TMS? Phillipa
Posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 11:09:23
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » brynb, posted by SLS on June 27, 2013, at 7:56:32
> > I was doing well after a trial of ketamine and TMS. I seemed to be ok
>
> Can you describe what it was like for you to be "ok"? What, if anything, did you feel that you were missing that you should want to try Nardil?
>Hi Scott-
I was basically functioning; able to get up daily and talk with my family, go out for a quick walk. And I wasn't having panic attacks or trouble sleeping. I was basically just getting by and getting along with my family. That said, I wasn't being social or going out, or working. I stopped socializing about 2 years ago, and haven't been able to work in over a year (and last I worked it was only part-time). So, my existence was better than "normal" or being depressed, but it wasn't good. I've gotten chronically worse as I've gotten older.
> I'm sure you know that you can't combine Nardil with either
Lexapro or tramadol.
>Yes, I do know, thanks :).
> > Last week, I o'd on a bunch of pills, and I don't know if it was self sabotage, a half-hearted attempt to kill myself or a dumb attempt to feel different, but it put me in a mega tailspin and I'm struggling again.
>
> No blame. No guilt. No judgment.
>
I appreciate that very much, but I can't stop whipping and judging myself over this. I just can't.> Perhaps you can learn from this. You don't necessarily have to repeat this behavior. I think it would help to be more certain as to what motivated you to do this, though.
>That's perhaps why I might see a therapist. I saw someone in the past but found her pretty useless; I'm hoping I can make the right connection with a good Tx and connect the dots.
> > an upcoming birthday had me in the dumps but I just can't justify my actions
>
> Lost time, advancing age, and a history of lack of reward and fulfillment is depressing. How can one not be depressed when he must pass time in the absence of enjoyment? Where is the joy?
>Again, thanks for understanding. I so appreciate it. It seems silly at almost 40 to complain about age and birthdays, but it's a searing reminder of how defeated I feel.
> Nardil is probably a better choice than Parnate when anhedonia is present along social anxiety or lack of sociability.
>
> > I'm my own worst enemy
>
> Join the club.
>
>
> - ScottThanks, Scott. I appreciate your words of support. I'm feeling super lonely and defeated. I struggle with how difficult it feels just to get by on a daily basis--I really thought I was coasting by and had become somewhat content with that as it's better than where I am again.
-b
Posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 11:12:40
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » brynb, posted by Phillipa on June 27, 2013, at 10:01:06
> Bryn I had no idea? I seriously thought the meds were working? I don't know what to say. Still seeing the pdoc that did the ketamine and TMS? Phillipa
Hi Phillipa-
It all just came crashing down last week--a week or so ago. I'm still seeing the same doc but I don't know anymore about the meds. I was ok on Lexapro and Tramadol but not "well." And neither prevents these debilitating episodes.
-b
Posted by Phillipa on June 27, 2013, at 20:31:11
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » Phillipa, posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 11:12:40
I honestly don't know what to say? Phillipa
Posted by Cee on June 27, 2013, at 23:50:10
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » brynb, posted by Phillipa on June 27, 2013, at 20:31:11
Finally something makes sence
Posted by Hugh on June 28, 2013, at 11:44:06
In reply to Nardil, finally?, posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 2:37:04
Bryn,
When was your last TMS session? Correct me if I'm wrong, but about a month ago, you were better than you'd been in a long time, but then you started on Nuvigil after finishing TMS, and that caused you to go into a tailspin, or at least you suspected it was the Nuvigil. I remember you said you had pneumonia too. If you're not doing TMS anymore, do you think a return to TMS might get you back to where you were a month ago?
Posted by brynb on June 28, 2013, at 13:44:21
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally?, posted by Hugh on June 28, 2013, at 11:44:06
> Bryn,
>
> When was your last TMS session? Correct me if I'm wrong, but about a month ago, you were better than you'd been in a long time, but then you started on Nuvigil after finishing TMS, and that caused you to go into a tailspin, or at least you suspected it was the Nuvigil. I remember you said you had pneumonia too. If you're not doing TMS anymore, do you think a return to TMS might get you back to where you were a month ago?Hi Hugh,
You're right--I was doing better after TMS, started Nuvigil which was a bad med for me, got pneumonia, but came out of the depression from Nuvigil in a week or so after taking it and started to get well again once I treated the pneumonia.
I don't want to spend the $ on TMS anymore; it helped, but seemingly only temporarily. I was doing well as in "functioning," but as I mentioned earlier in the thread, I wasn't socializing or working and haven't in some time...
I feel like I might benefit from Nardil as I never really gave an irreversible MAOI a shot, and I feel like Nardil has helped a lot of people.
Any thoughts on this?
Thanks,
b
Posted by Hugh on June 28, 2013, at 15:29:30
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » Hugh, posted by brynb on June 28, 2013, at 13:44:21
> I feel like I might benefit from Nardil as I never really gave an irreversible MAOI a shot, and I feel like Nardil has helped a lot of people.
>
> Any thoughts on this?
>
> Thanks,
>
> bThe only MAOI I've tried is selegiline, and only at a dose low enough to affect dopamine, not serotonin, so I didn't have any dietary restrictions. It was somewhat energizing, but that's about it. I never worked up enough nerve to try something heavy-duty like Nardil or Parnate. Just lately I've been getting good results from a supplement called d-limonene. I've been calmer, less depressed, been sleeping better. But it's been just under a week, so who knows if it will last. It works by binding to the adenosine A2A receptor. Here's a site about it:
Posted by brynb on June 28, 2013, at 15:47:26
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » brynb, posted by Hugh on June 28, 2013, at 15:29:30
Thanks for the info, Hugh. I tried Emsam in the past but can't say I gave it a fair shake. It did, however, make my anxiety worse, as it was too stimulating, so I had to stop it early on.
I forgot to mention that I was on a low dose of Seroquel which had helped me sleep and boosted my AD, but abruptly stopped it during this meltdown. I'm pretty sure that contributed to my current breakdown.
-b
Posted by brynb on June 29, 2013, at 6:24:25
In reply to Nardil, finally?, posted by brynb on June 27, 2013, at 2:37:04
I realized in my haze last week that I missed a few days of Tramadol, Lexapro and Seroquel. I know this is really messing me up.
I restarted my normal regimen; should I wait to see if I improve and stabilize a bit before trying to do a washout for Nardil? It seems if I get to a better place on my regular meds, then it will be an easier transition to try an changes...
thoughts?
b
Posted by Hugh on June 29, 2013, at 13:06:21
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally?, posted by brynb on June 29, 2013, at 6:24:25
You've been through a lot lately. I'd recommend stabilizing for a while before doing anything major like a washout and starting Nardil.
Posted by brynb on June 29, 2013, at 14:28:32
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » brynb, posted by Hugh on June 29, 2013, at 13:06:21
> You've been through a lot lately. I'd recommend stabilizing for a while before doing anything major like a washout and starting Nardil.
thanks, Hugh. I totally agree. I'm going to wait and try to stabilize before making any changes.
thanks again.
b
Posted by Phillipa on June 29, 2013, at 19:14:55
In reply to Re: Nardil, finally? » Hugh, posted by brynb on June 29, 2013, at 14:28:32
This is fabulous news!!!! Let me know how it goes back on your meds!!!! Phillipa
This is the end of the thread.
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