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Dr. Bob is Robert Hsiung, MD,
bob@dr-bob.orgShown: posts 1 to 25 of 28. This is the beginning of the thread.
Posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
is this how normal people feel?
im feeling...kinda...well weird.
i know the zyprexa is now well into my system. i think i started about 2 weeks ago.i feel very unnervingly happy... but also this sort of churning chaos of emotions inside.
i'm concerned because i still have periodic thoughts of suicide. and i know thati can be impulsive when it comes to self injury.
but i want to do Everything. Everything i haven't done while being down the last 6 months.
i also have this mixture of energy and anxiety.
its more than anxiety because its physical energy. my legs going 100mph under the desk at work.
im my brain thinking of ALL the crafts, tasks, cleanings and projects i've been needing to do over the winter months but haven't had seemingly time to do.
the good news is im writing again. it feels really good and its something i truly enjoy. i want to hang on to it. but now i feel like i'm going a little beyond what normal people feel.i just dont know.
but im doped on gabapentin to try to calm myself but now i'm just loopy on only 600mg and still full of physical energy.i'll give this another week and see how i handle it. it would be not so bad if it allows me to exercise in the morings again.
i went mon and tues morning. but not this morning.b2c.
Posted by Phillipa on April 11, 2012, at 15:44:44
In reply to is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
B2Chica I hear a lot of positives in your post. I'd hang in there give yourself a break from excercise for a while. Can you walk? Phillipa
Posted by sigismund on April 11, 2012, at 16:24:50
In reply to is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
That is how teenagers feel.
I think.
Posted by Solstice on April 11, 2012, at 18:00:03
In reply to is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
sounds more like hypomania at this point. You`re very self-aware.. and that`s a really good sign. Do what you can to keep your environmrnt as stable and trigger-free as possible. And take care of yourself!
Solstice
Posted by Phil on April 11, 2012, at 18:15:46
In reply to is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
Welcome to bipolarville. I know exactly how you feel. The happy part is great and surf the wave while it's there. I did.
The only problem that happens with bipolar are all of those thoughts, ideas, energy, etc start moving faster and faster and suddenly somebody has a serious emergency on their hands.
I'm no expert even tough I'm bipolar but I think I would let my doctor know what's going on.
We all want that wonderful frenetic energy and enthusiasm and that's why so many bp don't take their meds but it's also completely devastated people's lives.
Your call.
Posted by SLS on April 11, 2012, at 20:09:47
In reply to is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
Hi B2C.
How is your anxiety level?
- Scott
Posted by phidippus on April 11, 2012, at 20:14:02
In reply to is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
Gabapentin is not going to go too far as a sedative. Clonazepam or a little Seroquel might serve you better.
You're definitely anxious. Wanting to do EVERYTHING may or may not be an indication of mania.
How are your thoughts?
Eric
Posted by Zyprexa on April 12, 2012, at 4:01:44
In reply to is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 11, 2012, at 15:35:51
It can take a couple of months for the zyprexa to fully straighten you out. Especialy if you've been off it for 6 months. I would say 2-3 months. You have to remember that your brain has been trained in the wrong way for 6 months and takes time to get back to normal. If you realy feel bad you could take some extra zyprexa once in a while. Thats what has happened with me. Doc reduced me to 5 mg for a month and then back on to 10 mg. It didn't seem like enough so I took 15mg 2 times a week. Its been about 3 months back on 10mg and I'm finaly starting to feel like I'm back to normal. For a while I was realy anxious and just not thinking totaly normal.
what dose zyprexa has worked best for you in the past?
Posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 8:28:23
In reply to Re: is this mania or » B2chica, posted by Zyprexa on April 12, 2012, at 4:01:44
oh dearl lord siggy you're right...lol
man, dont wanna been teen again.
hmmm, bipolarville is a nice place to visit but i wouldn't want to live there...
it felt frenetic, but not in a bad way. idk, maybe this is what normal felt like and i'm just not used to it?
SLS
anxiety is noticeable but not out of control. i think between the zyprexa and gabapenting and perphenazine its now manageable, its noticeable but its not bad enough to be nauseating me...
ERic
im using the gaba for more anxiety issues than sedation.
and i didnt know about the wanting to do everything. cuz i've done so little over the last few months its just accumulated, so it could just be getting out of the hole i've been in. but i dont know.
Thoughts are transitory, but i have ADD as well.
Alas, my dear zyprexa.
10mg has normally worked the best for me in the past, but i gain so much weight when i'm up there. im only on 5mg now and i've gained another 3 and i am exercising!
i'm getting frustrated already.
i just wish i didnt have the weightgain with this med. i just dont understand why it has to do this.
was it you that take memantine or something like that to counter act weight gain? does it really work?
they told me topamax did that too and it did not, only gave me headaches and made me cycle bad.**************************
-Feeling a little low this morning. maybe yesterday was a fluke?
i just wanna eat and its only 8:30. i've had 2 bowls cereal, two purple peeps, and a scone a friend at work made...and of course my coffee.thanks all for your input
Posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:13:41
In reply to Re: is this mania or » B2chica, posted by Zyprexa on April 12, 2012, at 4:01:44
i'm beginning to think maybe its the generic zyprexa. i never had this problem with reg. zyprexa.
i feel like i'm freaking out. i'm a nervous wreck.
i cant think but in small snipits. i can read but cant comprehend...worse than normal.about 10:30 when my normal depression starts to hit i started to ruminate about suicide. i felt impulsive, wanted to leave work, down all my pills and jump into a lake...not a joke. '
on the other hand i felt frozen like i cant move.
like that now.
i took 600mg gabapentin at that time so i wouldnt leave.
i'm a hurricane inside but outer muscles feel frozen.i'm confused and energetic.
periodically i'm able to work. right now i cant focus (thus why i'm web surfing)
i also have waves of distraught, and excitement.God i just want to be put out. both of my misery and ...idk.
i want something i cant have.i cant write my own stuff either.
i'm sad and energetic at the same time. feels bad. i guess i keep typing cuz i dont know how to explain it. or more precisely i have many ways to describe it.what is this...bad side effect dysphoric mania, aggitation? hypomania?
i know you cant help me.
i know you'll say call pdoc but he's gotta be sick of seeing me. nobody really cares anyway.
i mean its all on me ya know. 'I' have to make that change. 'I' have to want to get better. maybe i dont. maybe i just want to curl up and make life go away.
i wish i could do that.
make life go away, for a while anyway.b2
Posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:21:34
In reply to my body is a mess Hellp, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:13:41
should i take xanax and knock myself out.
should i take what.
now what.
i'm climbing inside. i need to go walk around, but i cant seem to leave my chair.
Frozenthen i get tired and want to lay down.
i KNOW you'll say i'm being impulstive that i cant even wait and let the drug kick in properly.
i mean what i cant live one fricking day like this.
things aren't instant.
i tell my children that all the time. yet i cant take that myself.
i mean the highway goes both ways right.
i want to leave, nead to leave. go home.
wtf go home go home go home go home go home.
but alas i can not.
why am i typing this to you?? who F-ing cares! i mean really wtf.
Posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:43:30
In reply to This HAS To STOP » B2chica, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:21:34
ok. i'm calmer.
sad and dont want to talk at all.
curl up. wish.
sad but not sure why.
Posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:47:43
In reply to Re: This HAS To STOP, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:43:30
its been 2 weeks and 2 days that i've been on the TEVA brand generic zyprexa.
i really hope its just that its the generic.
i pray my go-to drug hasn't been pulled from my shelf of possibilities...
Posted by polarbear206 on April 12, 2012, at 18:23:10
In reply to Re: GENERIC issues, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:47:43
Many people with mood disorders have exacerbations with the season changes. May is the month with the highest rates of suicide
Posted by Phillipa on April 12, 2012, at 18:48:53
In reply to Re: GENERIC issues, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:47:43
How are you now that out of work for the day? Phillipa
Posted by B2chica on April 13, 2012, at 7:59:04
In reply to Re: GENERIC issues » B2chica, posted by Phillipa on April 12, 2012, at 18:48:53
i took extra gabapentin yesterday, mellowed me out substantially. my thoughts remained scattered but i need to be as focused outside of work.
my mood was still low until about 9:00. i had a few fleeting negative thoughts but they were fleeting. and kiddos around so i could much easier ignore them. nothing helps better than holding my babies. it may not make the thoughts disappear but helps me to focus and not think of acting on them.
Posted by phidippus on April 13, 2012, at 12:30:16
In reply to Re: This HAS To STOP, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:43:30
What are you on?
Eric
Posted by phidippus on April 13, 2012, at 12:32:24
In reply to my body is a mess Hellp, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 12:13:41
Sounds like a mixed state, absolutely. What are you taking?
Eric
Posted by phidippus on April 13, 2012, at 12:50:04
In reply to Re: is this mania or, posted by B2chica on April 12, 2012, at 8:28:23
Try Zonegran for the weigh issues. Worked for me.
Eric
ps. you reaally shoukld invest in some seroquel for when you get freaky-deaky. It works so much better than Zyprexa to calm things down.
Eric
Posted by b2chica on April 13, 2012, at 13:21:45
In reply to Re: is this mania or » B2chica, posted by phidippus on April 13, 2012, at 12:50:04
thank you eric. i agreed i think it was mixed state but lasted only couple days.
today way down. physically depressive.
pristiq
perphenazine
adderall
gabapentin
zyprexa
xanax prn
stopped melatonin when started zyprexa cuz so tired.
stopped buspar 2.5 weeks ago.
seroquel gave me cognitive blunting in the past.
Posted by b2chica on April 13, 2012, at 13:25:05
In reply to Re: is this mania or » B2chica, posted by phidippus on April 13, 2012, at 12:50:04
today i was waiting for the energy or dysphoria.
nothing.
infact i slowly decended.feel like a turtle. so hard to curl a smile, feels like my mouth is lifting weights when i can manage it.
so tired, but not. wanna lay on the floor, and just stay there.
cant focus, can function at work. luckily today i dont need high function. i can get away with minimal work. (i hope).
Posted by Zyprexa on April 13, 2012, at 17:33:40
In reply to today way opposite » phidippus, posted by b2chica on April 13, 2012, at 13:25:05
were you doing better or worse before zyprexa? Would 10mg work, you could try it I guess. See if you feel better or worse. If no good, I guess you could ask doc for some free samples of brand.
Posted by polarbear206 on April 13, 2012, at 17:34:30
In reply to today way opposite » phidippus, posted by b2chica on April 13, 2012, at 13:25:05
> today i was waiting for the energy or dysphoria.
> nothing.
> infact i slowly decended.
>
> feel like a turtle. so hard to curl a smile, feels like my mouth is lifting weights when i can manage it.
> so tired, but not. wanna lay on the floor, and just stay there.
> cant focus, can function at work. luckily today i dont need high function. i can get away with minimal work. (i hope).
>
>
I went to med checker and plugged all the drugs you take and 6 serious drug interactions came up. You need to get with a psychopharmacologist and re-eval your med regime
Posted by phidippus on April 14, 2012, at 20:34:24
In reply to Re: is this mania or » phidippus, posted by b2chica on April 13, 2012, at 13:21:45
You really need to be on a mood stabilizer. Have you been on any? Which ones?
Eric
Posted by phidippus on April 14, 2012, at 21:04:26
In reply to Re: is this mania or » phidippus, posted by b2chica on April 13, 2012, at 13:21:45
Why no mood stabilizer?
Seroquel's cognitive blunting effect can go away at higher doses.
Eric
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