Shown: posts 4 to 28 of 28. Go back in thread:
Posted by Phillipa on January 14, 2006, at 19:22:27
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by hopwitch on January 14, 2006, at 16:37:11
Maxime! So glad you wrote. You wouldn't believe the number of E-mails I've gotten wanting to know you are. I'm sorry things aren't going well. What happened to the adderal? Or is that a sore subject. I for one am very glad that the Nov attempt didn't work. Write when you can. Love your Jan!!!!!!
Posted by linkadge on January 14, 2006, at 20:58:16
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Phillipa on January 14, 2006, at 19:22:27
Hope you feel better. Stay connected if you can, we really care about you.
Linkadge
Posted by Jakeman on January 14, 2006, at 21:42:41
In reply to Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 14, 2006, at 10:44:58
Maxime,
We haven't corresponded much but I read your posts that always show much intelligence and basic sanity. Just telling what your going thru helps me and others.
warm regards ~Jake
Posted by shasling on January 14, 2006, at 21:48:06
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by hopwitch on January 14, 2006, at 16:37:11
I am not as eloquent as Amanda, but I do second that.
I've been there and you are right, it can be most frustrating and seems so counterproductive to the whole point of being there. Get out, get back here and get support of people who really know of what you speak. Please hang in and keep trying to get well.
Posted by 4WD on January 14, 2006, at 22:48:49
In reply to Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 14, 2006, at 10:44:58
Maxime, I am so glad you wrote and let us know what's going on. I am so sorry that things are not better yet.
Please know that everyone here is thinking about you and wondering how you are and hoping the best for you. Please try to hang on a while longer. Give the Prozac more time and keep asking them to increase the dosage.
I wish so much there was something I could do. I can only pray for you and that I will do.
Love,
Marsha
Posted by Maxime on January 21, 2006, at 12:25:36
In reply to Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 14, 2006, at 10:44:58
Another weekend pass. More time at a cyber cafe. $$$$$
Still no change. They will be increasing the Prozac to 60 mg next week.
I started an outpatient programme on Friday (even though I am still inpatient). It's a 10 week programme. I don't think I will be staying with it. It's too much to handle while I am still so depressed. I was the only one not smiling in the group. It's very intensive group therapy and things like OT etc. Part of it might be useful, but some of it scares me .... like the days we have to cook! ACK! Plus we have to eat our lunch together and it will be very uncomfortable for me since I don't eat lunch. I don't know. I have a week to try it out, but I don't think I will make it. Yesterday I started to cry before the group started.
I'm still really hopeless, suicidal and depressed.
Maybe they should have restarted the the Parnate instead of trying the Prozac.
A week after I was in the hospital I saw an expert in meds and affective mood disorders. He laid out a plan of meds for me to add on after the Prozac. Adderall is not one of the meds.:-(
I think Seroquel is next,but I lactate on it even though my doctor says it's impossible (my doctor I am assigned to in the hospital).I can't take too much more of this. If I were getting better, then I could say this horror is worth it. I really need to get out soon.
I hope to have internet access at home soon.
Maxime
Posted by shasling on January 21, 2006, at 12:52:06
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 21, 2006, at 12:25:36
Maxime, I am so like you. Life in general just gets exponentially harder when normal things like eating lunch with a group of people (which others do without batting an eye, and even enjoy) is so threatening. But, the reasons you stated, I totally understand and would have them myself.
I was in the hospital once and they were going to take us down the street to get an ice cream. I SO wanted no part of that, but they forced me. Here we are all traipsing down this busy street behind the attendant, obviously mental patients, and took over the ice cream shop. I felt like that Cuckoo's Nest group when they escaped and went fishing. It was so humiliating. And complicated by the fact that all I wanted to do was 1) sit in my room and die, or 2) be quietly hugged by someone safe. But the other people, they had a blast. Go figure... Same kind of thing with OT, and all the other time-wasting junk they make you do; I never got it, and it just hurt to be doing something so vapid when I was in such pain. So anyway, I think I understand what you're feeling.
The other thing is it's so hard to be patient while you are doing the suffering and the docs are running you through their favorite med paradigm. Please try to hang in there with that.
I'm sorry for your circumstance. It won't last forever. I'm glad you are here; at least you aren't alone.
Suzie
Posted by ed_uk on January 21, 2006, at 13:29:41
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 21, 2006, at 12:25:36
Hi Maxie
>They will be increasing the Prozac to 60 mg next week.
That's good. Perhaps they will increase it to 80mg soon. Prozac can take a long time to 'kick in' but it has worked well for you in the past :)
>I started an outpatient programme on Friday
It sounds difficult but worthwhile. Eating with other people will definitely be hard. Perhaps you could have a small portion of something healthy? You might meet some nice people in the group.
>I think Seroquel is next,but I lactate on it even though my doctor says it's impossible (my doctor I am assigned to in the hospital).
Perhaps you might not lactate on a low dose? Your doc will be proved wrong if you do.
>I hope to have internet access at home soon.
That would be excellent. I hope you do :)
Love
Ed xx
Posted by Phillipa on January 21, 2006, at 17:24:32
In reply to Re: Hospital hell » Maxime, posted by ed_uk on January 21, 2006, at 13:29:41
Maxie great to hear from you! But terribly sorry you're having such a hard time. Do you think you will do better at home? Love Phillipa
Posted by 4WD on January 21, 2006, at 22:04:04
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 21, 2006, at 12:25:36
Maxime, we miss you here so much. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. It makes my own troubles seem so much less.
About the lactating, maybe they would add bromocriptine to the Seroquel if it were to help you a lot. I mean if the Seroquel works, and lactating is the only problem, then the bromocriptine should stop the lactation (and I believe it's also used in depression sometimes).
Sending thoughts and prayers your way.
Marsha
Posted by Maxime on January 28, 2006, at 10:13:29
In reply to Re: Hospital hell » Maxime, posted by 4WD on January 21, 2006, at 22:04:04
I don't know if they will prescribe it not. I'm not at the Seroquel step yet. That's the next med to add if the Prozac doesn't work.
Maxie
> Maxime, we miss you here so much. I am so sorry you are having to go through this. It makes my own troubles seem so much less.
>
> About the lactating, maybe they would add bromocriptine to the Seroquel if it were to help you a lot. I mean if the Seroquel works, and lactating is the only problem, then the bromocriptine should stop the lactation (and I believe it's also used in depression sometimes).
>
> Sending thoughts and prayers your way.
>
> Marsha
Posted by Maxime on January 28, 2006, at 10:17:18
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 28, 2006, at 10:13:29
Yet another weekend pass. I can't believe that this week I will have been in the hospital for TWO MONTHS! It's crazy.
I'm now up to 60 mg of prozac and I still do not feel the effect of it yet. It's very discouraging and scary.
I wish they had restarted the Parnate. But the doctor said that the Trileptal I take may be what caused the the Parnate to stop working. I can't remember the reason why ... Maybe I could slowly get off the Trileptal?????
I'm so frustrated, sad and confused.
Maxime
Posted by gardenergirl on January 28, 2006, at 12:42:11
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 28, 2006, at 10:17:18
It's good to see you here. No wonder you're confused about the meds. I'm sorry you're not feeling a benefit yet. Bleah.
I'm so very glad you're hanging in there, though. We've missed you.
(((((Maxime)))))
gg
Posted by ed_uk on January 28, 2006, at 13:35:33
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 28, 2006, at 10:13:29
Hi Maxie
Did Prozac take a long time to start working when you took it before?
Love Ed xx
Posted by Phillipa on January 28, 2006, at 17:43:00
In reply to Re: Hospital hell » Maxime, posted by ed_uk on January 28, 2006, at 13:35:33
Maxie so sorry it isn't working yet. Hang in there we are all here for you Love Phillipa
Posted by Maxime on February 4, 2006, at 12:14:29
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on January 21, 2006, at 12:25:36
I was discharged from the hospital on Wednesday - exactly two months to the day of my admission.
I'm on 80 mg of Prozac now and I still haven't responded to it. I'm getting worried. I am as depressed and suicidal as I was 2 months ago. I am also taking trytophan with it to help it work more and because I am not eating properly.
I didn't like the day programme. It was very boring ... so I quit. I did like the psychologist and if I had the money I would pay to see her in private practice.
So my hospital hell is over and now it's just a living hell. Blah.
Maxime
Posted by ed_uk on February 4, 2006, at 12:32:21
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on February 4, 2006, at 12:14:29
Hi Maxie
It's good to hear from you as always :)
>I'm on 80 mg of Prozac now and I still haven't responded to it.
How long have you been on 80mg? It might take 4 weeks at 80mg to see a substantial improvement.
>I did like the psychologist and if I had the money I would pay to see her in private practice.
Is there any way you can see the psychologist without going to the day programme?
Love Ed xx
Posted by Phillipa on February 4, 2006, at 19:10:27
In reply to Re: Hospital hell » Maxime, posted by ed_uk on February 4, 2006, at 12:32:21
Hi Maxie I'm still routing for you . You will beat this I know you will!!!!!!!Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by 4WD on February 4, 2006, at 22:16:12
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Phillipa on February 4, 2006, at 19:10:27
Maxime,
They decided not to add the Seroquel? Nothing but trytophan? If you are still as depressed as before, are you in danger? Should you have left, even if you hated it?
I wish they had given you more med options. Its a shame to have spent so long there and walk away with just a script for Prozac. Will you try to augment it yourself further?
I'll continue to pray for you.
Marsha
Posted by Sarah T. on February 7, 2006, at 5:48:47
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on February 4, 2006, at 12:14:29
Hi Maxime,
It's good to see you. I have often wondered how you are.
Regarding Prozac, do you happen to know whether it is the least selective ssri? I was considering giving it another try. I have not done well on ssri's in the past, but I think that's because the ones I've spent the most time on have been the most selective. I think Zoloft has some effect on dopamine. Do you know how Zoloft and Prozac compare as far as their effects on dopamine?
Thanks.
Sarah
Posted by Maxime on February 7, 2006, at 15:38:13
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by 4WD on February 4, 2006, at 22:16:12
Hi,
I guess my pdoc can add the seroquel if I am not improving, which I am not.
My pdoc at the hospital thought I was well enough to leave even I told him I was suicidal. He said that being suicidal and having suicidal are different. The first is part of a personality disorder?????? But his question to me should have been "so do you have suicidal thoughts?". My answer would have been yes. I am still thinking about ways to take my life. I don't feel safe.
I'm frustrated.
Maxime
> Maxime,
>
> They decided not to add the Seroquel? Nothing but trytophan? If you are still as depressed as before, are you in danger? Should you have left, even if you hated it?
>
> I wish they had given you more med options. Its a shame to have spent so long there and walk away with just a script for Prozac. Will you try to augment it yourself further?
>
> I'll continue to pray for you.
>
> Marsha
Posted by Maxime on February 7, 2006, at 15:42:52
In reply to Welcome Back!, posted by Sarah T. on February 7, 2006, at 5:48:47
Hi Sarah. I wish I could answer your questions, but I can't. I was on Zoloft once and it stopped working after a month.
Maxime
> Hi Maxime,
>
> It's good to see you. I have often wondered how you are.
>
> Regarding Prozac, do you happen to know whether it is the least selective ssri? I was considering giving it another try. I have not done well on ssri's in the past, but I think that's because the ones I've spent the most time on have been the most selective. I think Zoloft has some effect on dopamine. Do you know how Zoloft and Prozac compare as far as their effects on dopamine?
>
> Thanks.
>
> Sarah
Posted by Phillipa on February 7, 2006, at 18:14:55
In reply to Re: Welcome Back!, posted by Maxime on February 7, 2006, at 15:42:52
Maxime do you have a computer now? If you babblemail me I'll give you my new E-mail address. Glad you're back and something has to work for you. Fondly, Phillipa
Posted by 4WD on February 7, 2006, at 20:33:36
In reply to Re: Hospital hell, posted by Maxime on February 7, 2006, at 15:38:13
Hi Maxime,
And well you should be frustrated. I can't believe he didn't go ahead and add the Seroquel and left you to take care of that on your own. And I've never heard of being suicidal as a "personality disorder."
I know you were very eager to leave the hospital but I am worried about you. You are right. He should have asked you if you were having suicidal thoughts. And he should have asked if you were actively suicidal and if you felt safe to go home.
Please talk to your pdoc asap. Seroquel didn't help me much but I was on a very low dosage and I was taking it for anxiety. I know a lot of people here really swear by it.
Hang in there. Something will work. And you know, depression is cyclical. It's possible that it will gradually ease at least somewhat entirely on its own.
Marsha
> Hi,
>
> I guess my pdoc can add the seroquel if I am not improving, which I am not.
>
> My pdoc at the hospital thought I was well enough to leave even I told him I was suicidal. He said that being suicidal and having suicidal are different. The first is part of a personality disorder?????? But his question to me should have been "so do you have suicidal thoughts?". My answer would have been yes. I am still thinking about ways to take my life. I don't feel safe.
>
> I'm frustrated.
>
> Maxime
>
> > Maxime,
> >
> > They decided not to add the Seroquel? Nothing but trytophan? If you are still as depressed as before, are you in danger? Should you have left, even if you hated it?
> >
> > I wish they had given you more med options. Its a shame to have spent so long there and walk away with just a script for Prozac. Will you try to augment it yourself further?
> >
> > I'll continue to pray for you.
> >
> > Marsha
>
>
Posted by Sarah T. on February 13, 2006, at 0:57:19
In reply to Re: Welcome Back!, posted by Maxime on February 7, 2006, at 15:42:52
Hi Maxime,
Thanks for your reply. I've been having major problems with my computer, so I haven't been around here much this week. That's why I didn't reply sooner.S.
This is the end of the thread.
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