Posted by Susan47 on February 24, 2006, at 17:32:13
the same, my feelings for him. Today, in my mind, I saw his face, and it was such a welcome sight. Walking the street, in pain, sick, I looked through a window and a stranger there, it was easy to imagine it was his back, the side of his head, I even took the curls of this stranger to be straight so that my mind could conjure him, and it did, it did so wonderfully that I was comforted.
I love him still. I'll always feel this way, I know that now, and so do many others, no doubt, hold him in particular as a cherished part of their history.
I miss him so much.
It's very hard, being without him.
I don't know, sometimes, how I'll do it; live the rest of a life without seeing his dear face. He has the most gorgeous.. everything, I'm sure. I'm so sure that even the imperfections are perfect ... this dreaming .. for a while, it was everything in my life. This love, were it real, would be utterly impossible to sustain, yet the weight of what is not ... the orchid is open.
It waits in longing .. imagining your touchDo you know me? No. You have an imagined version of who I am, a cobbled-together idea ... but not any reality that would lead you to the truth. Poor soul, when I think of you thus.
I love you so much. So very ... cathartic. I love you. I love you. I love you ...
What I see reflected back at me, is so very beautiful. Not incredible, just a joy to behold.
I love you.
:)
poster:Susan47
thread:612883
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20060125/msgs/612883.html