Posted by 10derHeart on April 21, 2005, at 9:59:34
In reply to Re: compliments » sunny10, posted by Damos on April 20, 2005, at 17:34:17
You know, that really is the first step. And I've found it works, with much practice.
I was horrible at compliments until a couple years ago. I just decided to say, "thank you." And for me, to also try to look the person in the eye (incredibly hard as *appropriate* eye contact is a HUGE issue/problem/challenge with me...)
At first, it's like you're going to choke or something. You find yourself doing some, "well, thanks, but..." or things like that. But, with repetition, it gets easier. Really. In fact, it can become natural and second nature. Doesn't mean I 100% accept every single compliment, but it does mean most times my mind is saying, "well, yeah, that sounds right/okay...could be true." Sometimes that's a real step foreward! And sometimes...now sit down so you don't faint..I can even say thanks and think, "d*mn right, " about whatever nice thing they've said. But it did take a LONG time to get to that point.
Change is possible. It's an erasing and re-writing of those "heads tapes" ana mentioned in another thread....
poster:10derHeart
thread:481115
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/write/20050419/msgs/487408.html