Posted by alexandra_k on June 22, 2013, at 21:10:43
In reply to Re: It's time... » alexandra_k, posted by Phillipa on June 16, 2013, at 11:35:32
Hmm...
Apparently there are a few simple rules. So the idea is to get used to them one at a time.
The most simple version (e.g., +1) and then more difficult patterns (e.g., +1, -1, +2, -2).
And different aspects for the rules to operate over. Such as color alteration or object rotation or whatever.
I've been plugging away a bit at conceptual physics...
Getting my confidence up.
And now organic chemistry...
Chemistry is quite beautiful. With the whole everything being comprised of atoms thing.
I'm starting to get the hang of things...
Acids and bases and just starting to learn the repeatable blocks.Population health turns out to be epidemiology.
Which I guess I'd kind of expected.
But epidemiology turns out to be quantitative critical reasoning
Which I'd not really expected.
I'm sort of kind of tossing up whether I should do the science or the social science pathway...
But really I know the thing to do is take the easy (for me) option and find me some hobbies.
I think I've figured it out...
It isn't so much that they want to see the 'genius at everything'
(There is no such thing)
Or even the 'highly competitive'
(Type A stressed person more like to consume than produce)
It is more that they want to see the 'coping strategies' that are in place.
So instead of 'national representative' in this and that
They are more interested in hobbies and interests
Which of course become less interesting if one takes them too seriously.
I think I'll make more of an effort to regularly get to art galleries / museums.
I already do nature walks as I'm able.
The gym doesn't sound so great since gyms are varied and most people are appearance focused...
Yoga sounds better... Group fitness.
I guess I should join a university club or two...
And I expect I'll need to find something that gives off the appearance of 'social'.It is hard because I was nearing the end (or the start really) of a field of study... So just when my idiosyncracies were about to well and truly take off I need to reign everything back in and give off more of an appearance of 'normal'. Sigh.
I'm really kinda scared.
In a way I feel it isn't fair...
I've got a number of friends who are in a similar position to be
But citizens of a different country and med schools are stoked to get them
I don't feel like this country values me, particularly,
What I have to offer.
Maybe it is just my time at tech getting me down
Their attitude seemed to be that I didn't deserve to learn anymore because I'd learned enough.
Or some kind of gloating about my supposed lack of interpersonal skills because I couldn't slot in happily with kids half my age who aren't literate enough to use language with a literal communicative function.
I see now why I kept hearing about 'tall poppy syndrome' in the US...
NZ...
Has got it.
Big time.So...
I'm not entirely sure whether medicine is for me...
The medical people I know (who also did philosophy) thought it most probably was not
(And that I'm going about things backwards or in reverse order)
But I was foolish to study philosophy before acquiring a knowledge base of stuff to be philosophical about
And when I see what stuff there is out there (e.g., epidemiology) I feel a bit embarrassed about (some of) the state of philosophy (e.g., critical reasoning).
There has got to be a way to blend them well and truly...I guess what interests me the most...
Is that I am a Terrific Student.
Really.... You really will not find a better undergraduate student than me.
I'm able to focus on what is relevant and not get side tracked on tangents.
I'm able to ask intelligent relevant questions and not get side tracked into asking questions for questions sake or attempting to sound intelligent
I'm able to devote a great deal of time to learning the content and I'm an active learner (asking myself questions along the way and going back over things so understanding deepens like with the chemistry)You know... Maybe this is odd... But one of the most beautiful things in the world (to me) is a well written textbook. I think about the centuries of learning that have gone into developing that. How every word is carefully thought out. I mean some books have gone through 10 or 11 versions... WIth whole TEAMS of editors. With classes and classes and classes of students and multiple lecturers and tutors offering feedback... A significant accomplishment indeed. And in studying one... One really needs to appreciate that that is what one has before one. So one needs to really apply oneself to understanding why each word has been selected. Why things are unpacked in that particular order (different textbooks are instructive in being so very much the same and it is only when one attempts to write ones own that one comes to really appreciate the good reason).
ANyway... What is medicine...
If it isn't that something (as a society) that we value..
We value well and truly enough to devote ourselves more (than any other field) to a truly high standard of teaching.
The most up to date... Advanced state of our knowledge.
More than any other field.
It seems to me, at any rate.
And things like cadaver dissection...
And then ward rounds...
A learning opportunity like nothing else (it seems to me).
And all because... Of what we are going to put back...
The thought is.
I suppose.I worry, though...
Because this country doesn't have much money.
We don't have the population or the money to support the raising of
superspecialists.
Which is probably partly why we aren't so particularly interested in the super high achiever in most everything they do (though of course genius in nothing)
I think what they are most interested in
(That frightens me, actually)
Is the happy healthy well rounded person
WHo will be happy enough living in some small rural community town
FOREVER
Like the traditional English GP.
So someone who isn't terribly ambitious
Who isn't terribly smart (just smart enough)
Someone who is properly embedded in the community
(Family ties)
Someone who is properly embedded in the community
(Valued in the community for what the community values - e.g., club rugby)Of course they don't come right out and SAY that...
But that is what scares me... That that is what they want, really.They don't say that as part of their marketing...
But I wonder how much pressure the government puts for that kind of selection...And I wonder what is in my future...
What is in the future for me.ANd I get scared.
I think it is more that when I see medicine I see OPPORTUNITY
for a whole bunch of different things.
Everything else... All the other alternatives I see as LIMITING OPPORTUNITIES in various ways.And Physiotherapy turned out not to be about a body of knowledge as it turned out to be about smiling appropriately.
I've come to learn that now: My toes are clawed and walking is painful because my physiotherapist was focused on massaging and smiling and not on joint manipulations and stretching.
I'm supposed to value the ignorant smiling more than the knowledgeable person who insisted on properly manipulating my feet. That makes me feel angry.
Here's what NZ:
When you get sick you can have the happy healthy well rounded person. You can have the smiley person who can't comprehend or communicate with literal English. You can have the national rep in sport of music.
But let me have the person who knows what they are doing and who is focused in getting on and doing it.
Please.
For reals.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:1045365
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20130612/msgs/1045712.html