Posted by Deneb on September 20, 2008, at 16:00:32
In reply to Racer + Deneb, posted by Kath on September 17, 2008, at 21:13:18
I'm pretty sure I don't want to die. Right now I'm trying to eat healthy because I want to live a long time.
However, I'm still a bit obsessed with the Ledge.
This is what I'm thinking...
First I will lose 30 pounds. Then when I go to San Francisco, I will walk across the Golden Gate Bridge. Then I will climb over the railing and stand or sit on the Ledge. Then I will climb back onto the bridge.
There is a chance that I might fall off the ledge and plummet to my death. If that happens then it was my destiny. There is also the possibility that I will impulsively jump off, in which case that will also be my destiny.
However, most likely I will want to live and I will climb back onto the bridge.
Hopefully I will not do this because it is just endangering my life recklessly.
Maybe it is that choice of life or death that draws me. I don't know.
There is a part of me that thinks it might be amusing to die for no good reason at all. Not depressed, not suicidal, just decided to end my life just because. No one will understand my death. It will be a puzzle to all. It will also prove that people can commit suicide while happy and content.
poster:Deneb
thread:851274
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20080905/msgs/853117.html