Posted by Gabbi-2 on August 15, 2007, at 19:31:28
In reply to compliments on appearance, posted by caraher on August 15, 2007, at 16:19:43
> And who am I to remark on someone else? It seems presumptuous; the other person doesn't exist for my own visual gratification, right?
This is where my brain has a problem (well, one of the places)
I totally agree with you - intellectually.
When I was younger, and got complimented by men frequently, I was even then in two minds about it.
I'd thank the person, if it wasn't creepy, but think "Does that mean the other 10 women you just saw didn't meet your approval"?
However, last year, I was having a really bad time, my fiance and I were having problems, and I was feeling at an all time low as far as self esteem went.
I was out having coffee with my dad, and a woman walked by and said
"Oh my god, you're so beautiful, I could just like....stare at you all day"
She said it in a really lighthearted way, so I didn't feel uncomfortable.And you know, I hung onto that compliment like a life preserver. I still hang onto it, I sometimes think I should send her flowers on every anniversary of that compliment : )
And I don't think complimenting a particular attribute (okay well, skip the sexual ones) but like Fayeroe said someone's blue eyes, can really ever go wrong, and you never know what effect it may have. People don't hear nice things about themselves very often I don't think.
poster:Gabbi-2
thread:776471
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20070803/msgs/776501.html