Posted by jammerlich on April 23, 2006, at 22:01:37
Well, I want one other than the one I have. God gave me a rotten one, if you ask me. And it feels like there is a hole inside of me that will never be filled unless I can have something like a "normal" (whatever that means) sort of mother/daughter relationship. It hurts an awful lot. And it feels really, really lonely. Remember the Dr. Suess book where the little - bird, was it(??) - walked around asking everyone and everything, "Are you my mother?" I'm sort of lost like that.
My sweet teacher/friend is becoming something like a mother. She tells me I'm like the daughter she never had. I don't know if she really means it, but it sure is nice to hear. She's out of town right now and I miss her so much. I keep telling myself she'll be back Tuesday night, but it doesn't help. I helped her book her ticket, but the selfish part of me hated doing it. Her husband joked that he hoped it was a one-way ticket. I wanted to hit him. I ache for her; I have for 20 years, ever since she was my teacher. She is special.
I'd hoped writing this would help with the hurt; but so far, not so much. Any suggestions on how to get through the next couple of days?
And is it possible to fill this "mother hole?"
poster:jammerlich
thread:636346
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20060422/msgs/636346.html