Posted by TamaraJ on November 3, 2005, at 20:15:59
In reply to Afraid to clean my house, posted by fallsfall on November 3, 2005, at 18:09:47
> I went back to 10 hours a week at work this week. So things are different/changing. I hate it when things change. I love being in a rut.
>
-- Yeah, change can be intimidating and unnervering, but not all change is bad. When our routines or "ruts" are disrupted, it throws us off and I guess we get scared or something that we won't know what to do with ourselves. Maybe I'm off base there. That's how I feel sometimes - when all of a sudden my days are not laid out from morning till night with the "usual" things to do and places to be. It's like - what now?> So I've started napping a lot this week. I think it is because I'm afraid to do what I should be doing next - cleaning my house and getting my life organized. Why does that scare me? Because what happens after that? What do people DO when their lives are organized and they don't have a list 16 miles long of things that should have been done last month?
>
-- I think you answered your own question - what happens after that? That's what's scary. Perhaps when our days aren't full, we get scared that we will retreat. I think that is probably an even scarier prospect for those of us who have struggled with depression. It's like - if I stop now, what if I can't get going again? What if I go back to that place that I have fought so hard to get out of? But, it doesn't have to be that way. Having some time to yourself, to do things at your leisure, without pressure, to pamper yourself, etc., doesn't have to be scary.> The class I'm taking will be over in a month, and new classes don't start until the end of January. This is probably enough time for me to actually get things in order here.
>
> But then what?
>
-- There are probably all kinds of things you can do to keep yourself and your mind active between now and the end of January. The holidays are coming, there's volunteer work that could fill some of the time, if you are crafty or whatever, you could even make some of your Christmas gifts. I bet you will find all kinds of fun and interesting things to do to occupy your time.> I hate change.
-- Yeah, I do to at times :-(
Take care, fallsfall. I hope the scary feelings pass.
Tamara
poster:TamaraJ
thread:575100
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20051029/msgs/575169.html