Posted by Shy_Girl on March 9, 2005, at 8:43:28
In reply to Re: Rational suicide for competent adults » Shy_Girl, posted by Tabitha on March 9, 2005, at 2:29:43
> That line of thought telling you to kill yourself is not rational, it's part of your illness. It's not a voice of reason, it's a voice of a malfunctioning brain. Your rational self would be able to see other options besides self-destruction.
>
> Those types of thoughts are only good for one thing-- as an indicator that you need a med check. Other than that, you need to learn to treat those thoughts as useless junk.Hello
I'm open to rational discussion. I can see myself living a happy life in the future at times, but it is not likely to happen. I've already wasted too much of my famiy's money going to school. Even though it is possible for me to get A's when I'm feeling good, I will still never achieve my goals of doing research in a lab because I get too anxious. It is not a good thing to have shaky hands while pouring conc. sulfuric acid! :P I did really well last semester, but this semester started off on the wrong foot because of the anxiety...then came the stupid hosptial stay that further made me behind. I think the pdoc at the hospital totally over-reacted to my ASA overdose...I did careful research and made sure to take a non-lethal dose. Argh, I had to drop this semester because I couldn't study, because I was obsessed with researching methods and the effects of drugs....it's quite interesting. I must find out why one must check for pulmonary edema in an ASA overdose (unfortunately I haven't studied much of my physiology class). Anyways, without my family, I will probably be homeless. I don't have any life experience or friends. Perhaps tendancy towards suicide is selected for in evolution because it enables resources to be concentrated to where they are needed.
In the meantime, I will see if indeed some of my unhappiness is biological in nature by seeing if the 20mg Celexa will make me feel better. I think it is working somewhat. I also need to take care of my hamster because my family is afraid of him.
Thanks for reading :)
poster:Shy_Girl
thread:468490
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050305/msgs/468651.html