Posted by jay on January 18, 2005, at 13:32:01
In reply to Jay -- Long » jay, posted by Snoozin on January 18, 2005, at 12:17:34
> > Susan I have been reading your posts...a bit envious I am, I must say.
>
> <<Nah, don't be envious. Take it as a sign that you *will* find someone compatible. :-) I did the internet personals thing very intensely for over a year. Which means, by the way, about 200 failures by e-mail, and about 20 failures in person. :-) I was getting so frustrated, that instead of sending a letter to a guy, I just sent one of those flirts because I didn't think we were that compatible and didn't think he'd answer. *That's* the guy I'm dating.
>
> For what it's worth: One thing I did find out is that my personality type of Myers Briggs is apparently very rare, and worse, there are apparently very few people out there that I actually click with. This guy happens to be one of them (and he had taken the MB test, too). It might be that you've got one of those rare personality types that doesn't click so easily with others. That actually made me feel *better* because my secretary had been telling me I was too picky.
>
> Some tips from my experience (these happened):
>
> Don't post pictures of a computer you cobbled together from scratch. *This* does not impress most people.
>
I hate computers....so no prob there. :)
> Don't, for goodness' sake, name that computer after your mother. Actually, it's best to not even mention your mother. :-)
>
Ya, I am not into that Freudian thing..lol.> Don't post a picture of yourself that's 20 years old.
>
Good GAWD! I'd be 15...and acne busting out all over my face!> *Do* say you are looking for a LTR or marriage, if you are. Be 100% genuine. There are women out there looking for the same thing you are.
>
Yep, I do that> Don't get sexual in your ad or in any letters right off the bat. One guy said he'd been into the *swinging* lifestyle for almost 20 years, but would be willing to give it up for the right woman. Yeah. Right.
>
No, that is off-limits....> Don't say you are desperate to marry a woman because your last wife left you because she's gay.
>
Ha! Never been married...so no prob there! lol> E-mail/contact women with similar interests and similar level of attractiveness. I am no beauty queen, trust me, so I certainly didn't go after hunks.
>
Oh ya...well I can tell many of the REALLY veign-and-vanity types when they place "Looks: Highest Importance" "Intelligence: Lowest Importance". HAH!!!!!!!!!> Don't be negative at all in your ad or letters. Don't write *I've almost given up hope.* I personally don't like *tired of the games* or *no drama queens please* type posts. It means they've had a long history of being involved with drama queens and probably like conflict in their lives. Don't say you are lonely. Emphasise the good things you are looking for/can offer. Don't even mention the bad. That's for later when you and the person get to know one another.
>Oh ya...I am always quite up and such. Maybe too much sometimes...as I am very positive in my communication. It's only here I can come crying for help from my friends. :-)
> And my personal pet peeve. Don't be super-specific with the type of woman you want. i.e., "seeking a girl 5'4" to 5'8", slim build, long hair, manicured nails, loves skirts and backrubs, small button nose and double-pierced ears." EVEN if I fit the description to a T, the guy's particular-ness (word?) is a real turn-off. Rather meet an open minded guy....
>
Ughhhh...again, never, ever would do that. I always say "I don't believe in perfection."
> And, last but not least, be open-minded about a girl whose picture isn't the most attractive *you've* seen, either. I think people are almost always better looking in person. :-)
>
> Good luck!Hey, thanks! Ya, I write to anyone who has a somewhat intelligent profile (minus the looks stuff)...but again I can even compromise there!
Hmmmmm...Did you find someone from your own living area..like city or whatever? Or somewhere close by? Or was it long-distance?Thanks,
Jay
poster:jay
thread:443605
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050116/msgs/443736.html