Posted by Atticus on January 11, 2005, at 20:51:21
In reply to Atticus, you don't have to hide anymore :), posted by Jai Narayan on January 9, 2005, at 7:45:26
Thanks for the nice piece of writing, Jai. ;)
It's only been four days, but having it now widely known among people at work that I'm bipolar has been kind of odd. On the one hand everyone is treating me the same as they did before. On the other hand, there's sometimes a distinct sense -- conveyed in the nervous flutter of a hand or an averted gaze or a cut-off sentence -- that certain people have to work very hard at this. But I sort of figure, sauce for the goose ... and all that. I worked incredibly hard at concealing the condition at work for most of a decade. If it bothers them and they can't come to terms with it, now it's their turn to conceal their discomfort with it. If someone were to call me "crazy" to my face in an ultraliberal environment like the university where I work, I think it would be regarded to some extent as equivalent to hurling a racist epithet. Anyway, the decision was made for me by some people with big mouths, so there wasn't any agonizing over it on my part. It had somehow just become a done deal while I was away on the two-month disability leave. Still, it leaves my life a bit patchwork. Can mention it to immediate family, except my father, who doesn't believe in mental illness. Can't mention it to extended family (believe me, I know what their reaction would be like). Can mention it here. Wouldn't bring it up on a date or among just any group of people. Can bring it up at work (mainly with my supervisor) if I'm having a bit of a rough day. I know there are still some boundaries, some reefs to navigate. Some days it's exhilarating. Some days it's intimidating.
"Nobody told me there'd be days like this/
Strange days indeed." - John Lennon
Ta. ;) Atticus
poster:Atticus
thread:437772
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20050106/msgs/440862.html