Posted by pegasus on November 17, 2004, at 13:13:05
In reply to Re: Husband doesn't understand..how do I handle this?, posted by tampagirl70 on November 17, 2004, at 8:24:53
My therapist eventually had to talk to my husband to get through to him. I wasn't ever able to really crack his huge shield of denial. I think what finally got us on (more or less) the same page about depression etc. was when my therapist explained to him (without me there), that there are times when the only thing standing between me and suicide is not wanting to hurt my husband. And that if he didn't try to recognize that fact, and act accordingly, then chances were that I wasn't going to make it. And then, my T talked to me about how my husband's denial was protecting him from being afraid for me all the time, and that we needed to communicate with and support each other on this issue.
So, that's when we set up our weekly therapy report sessions. I tell him what I talked about in therapy, and he tells me how it affects him, and what his fears and frustrations are. And we both try really hard not to take either side really personally, and to be supportive and understanding. It has helped a lot. Now he agrees with me that therapy is an expense that we just have to fit in somehow. I literally can't live without it.
I know it's kind of a polyanna story, but I just wanted to share it, to say that it's not hopeless.
pegasus
poster:pegasus
thread:416741
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20041114/msgs/417105.html