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Re: expectations ** possible trigger ** » deirdrehbrt

Posted by Angel Girl on June 19, 2004, at 11:27:55

In reply to Re: expectations, posted by deirdrehbrt on June 18, 2004, at 16:43:41

Dee

Yes, I agree with everything you've said. Telling people I have chronic fatigue would certainly explain part of it (as I sit here thinking I need a nap right now) but there is also the other part as you stated, the losing interest in things, even the interest to stay alive. I know exactly what you're feeling, I've been there. I was in that black hole so long, I never thought I would ever get out. It is such a horrible place to be and nobody but nobody will ever be able to understand *that* part of depression without having been there. I can remember standing at my bathroom vanity looking at the countless bottles of pills and feeling compelled to take every single one because I was so incredibly depressed and the strange thing was that I had no idea what drove me to that point on that particular day because nothing had happened. Have you had days like that? It's just horrible. At least if you know what drove you to that point, that's one thing but to have this overwhelming compulsion to kill yourself and not know why, that I think is the lowest you can go, short of going through with it.

AG


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