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Dear Diary June 11

Posted by Ilene on June 11, 2004, at 18:33:53

In reply to Dear Diary June 10, posted by Ilene on June 10, 2004, at 20:21:38

Today is the little cicada's birthday. She is 18. I can't believe I have raised the little bug to so-called adulthood. She got a stuffed Hello Kitty wearing a kimono from her father and me, and a book of Celtic tales from her brother (I helped him choose it). (She also got a blue topaz pendant set in 14 kt. gold for graduation, which matches the earrings I gave her last year. She wears these all the time; I think we're going to have to get a heavier chain for the pendant.)

She's off at a No Doubt concert w/ a couple of friends. The driver is a budding alky. (I think he was diagnosed bipolar; his mother committed suicide. I hate mental illness.) Anyway, I told her to call us if he drinks. I've always been very easy about where she goes and when she comes home, but now I'm starting to worry about alcohol. She's like me; she doesn't like to drink--might have inherited my low ability to metabolize ethanol. The problem is other people who drink and get behind the wheel.

I am very, very tired. I didn't sleep well, and I woke up early and didn't go back to sleep. I've also been having problems with hypotension today, but I'm finding that drinking the electrolyte potion *really helps*. I have to drink about a quart for it to be effective. The minerals in it (sodium, magnesium, potassium, etc.) help keep me from just peeing out the extra fluid. I don't feel bloated, either.

I can't remember if I took any Klonopin today. If I did, it was in the morning. I am not feeling anxious. Maybe the Zyprexa is actually doing something. And yes, I think I gained some weight, but only a little.

I did some Important Chores, but when I went to the P.O. I discovered it was closed on account of Reagan's funeral. H-E-double-hockeysticks. I guess this is what they mean by "less government".

I've been relatively productive today, considering. Felt depressed earlier. I envisioned myself becoming a depressed old woman.




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