Posted by Angielala on December 29, 2003, at 14:11:26
In reply to husband and ocd problems, posted by tampagirl on December 29, 2003, at 12:58:24
Would bringing your best friend and Hubby together for a talk be a wise idea? Or would that cause you too much stress? People can say anything about anyone when they are not there, but if they are face to face, maybe you can find out what really happened.
One thing that sticks out in my mind is the fact that he said it was hypothetical. I also have OCD- and I think this might be the trigger for your relapse. He's making an odd suggestion, and even though he may not define it as "hitting on" it was still inappriate.
The best thing to do for right now is to remind yourself- you don't know the whole story. What I do when I have repeating thoughts that cause depression and stress is try to find a positive, yet realistic mantra to repeat in my head. Find a place you can be alone- maybe even start in the car when you are driving and say it out loud first- something like "What my mind needs to know I will discover. What my heart needs to know, I will be patient" It sounds really weird... but after reciting it, try "obessing" on that thought.
Communication is what needs to happen. This is so unfair that YOU have to suffer for something that is probably a huge misunderstanding. Find the truth, even if you are scared of it.
Have you a safe mental place to go to? As in can you close your eyes and see yourself sitting on a familiaar beach that you know and just listen to the ocean waves and the seagulls cooing... feeling the warm breezes over your skin? I know that takes a lot of effort to clear the repeating thoughts to get to a place like that, but if you practice at night or at the most stressful OC times, you may find that you actually have control. It takes times and don't worry about being on the meds for a little longer. They will just help take that edge off- you need them just a little longer, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Be strong- let me know how things go... let me know if there is anything I can do to help.
~Angie
> hi ~ i used to post here a long time ago, and now i'm back. i have ocd and have been through a couple bouts of depression. just before xmas, my closest friend told me that my husband was hitting on her. i confronted him about it and he denied it all, saying that what he had said to her was hypothetical. i want to believe him, but i can't figure out who's telling the truth. she really doesn't have any reason to make anything up. the worst part of this is that since this came up last tuesday, 12/23, i've been obsessing about the things that i obsess about, mainly our marriage and relationship. i was so close to going off my meds, but now this set back has really upset me and its been about 3 years since i've had to deal with any depression or ocd. i can't stand it and hate myself for being this way. anyone have any suggestions? thanks.
poster:Angielala
thread:294319
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031229/msgs/294353.html