Posted by DharmaMama on October 29, 2003, at 13:56:42
In reply to Why is mommy sick? Talking to kids., posted by sfmom on October 26, 2003, at 10:56:54
Hey Mama! I am a mother of two, ages 2 & 7. I have not been diagnosed with aything, just placed on Topamax. It is so frustrating to have something wrong with you and not know exactly what is wrong, waiting months to see a dr. I can give you the spiel of my life, I will spare you.
Kids, no matter what age, sense when something is wrong with Mama. It is some sort of inner connection we have with our brood.
My husband, partner, whatever, works nearly 24/7 and I am with my two when I am not at work. At times I find it hard to deal with them after a days work. When I was having a down time and just wanted to lay down and not face the world, I wld let my kids run a muck in the house. I did not care what they would do to the house. This was so not me. Or when I would have a panic attack from being at home alone with the kids, I was afraid of what I would do to the kids. I was scared of hurting them. Then I was scared of them turning out like me. I would have thoughts of putting them out of their misery.
The most scary thing is, I have told my p-doc this and he did not do anything. Just wrote out a script for Topamax. Being a naturalist, I was hesitant to take it. I am thankful I did.
Of course my oldest is older than yours. She is a bit more understanding when I say I had a hard day at work.
Most important thing is to smile to your two year old even when you are not in the best of moods. Lots of hugs as well. Sounds like you have been very loving to her for her to be so compasionate.
My suggestion, find a collective group of other Mamas. Start or join (e.g. Yahoo group) a group in your community of other like minded (way of raising, playgroups) mothers. Like a co-op babysitting group. Or if you have a trusted friend, relative, Mother's day out program, where you can have a couple of hours to yourself and seek solitude. It is not being selfish. We all need a couple of hours to ourselves.
I have joined an AP group. We have playgroup every monday, potlucks on weekends, Mama's night once a week, share in babysitting when needed, ask for advice when needed. It is so wonderful.
I do not make it to Monday playgroups or very much to our night outs.
It was a hard step for me to take to get into this group of wonderful women. I am a shy person. However, this was so great for me to get into.
If you do not feel comfortable on your meds, maybe ask your doctor to change them?? I hope this is some help.
poster:DharmaMama
thread:273608
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20031020/msgs/274673.html