Posted by Dinah on July 18, 2003, at 8:46:05
In reply to sometimes..., posted by Penny on July 17, 2003, at 14:46:50
I'm sorry, Penny. What an awful memory to have as your final one of your grandfather.
We faced this with a friend of the family, and I did a lot of thinking about it then. My personal opinion is that some people can compartmentalize parts of their lives. So the grandfather you knew and loved, the grandfather who was a hero, was still all those things. But since you have said that he admitted to the other side of him in his final letter, it's clear that there was a compartmentalized part of him that did things that can't be forgotten. Not even by him, obviously.
It must be hard for you, on a continuing basis, to see all the strife in your family, and to understand all sides of it, and love everyone involved, and feel helpless to do anything about it. Can you remember that you are helpless, that you can't fix it, and not place too much of that burden on yourself?
Take care of yourself, Penny.
poster:Dinah
thread:242903
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030713/msgs/243120.html