Posted by Dinah on June 8, 2003, at 11:31:48
In reply to Workplace frustrations update (long), posted by noa on June 8, 2003, at 10:11:19
Hi Noa,
Maybe this is part of the same attitude on their parts that had them evaluate your co-worker the way they did. If they're all on the same page about what they expect, maybe they see anyone who isn't as being "not a team player" or whatever they saw your co-worker as being. It might not be handbook definitions as much as shared expectations among the supervisors who work closely together.
Even in the very small workplace I'm at, I run into the same sort of problems. Sometimes they'll be upset with me for not meeting expectations I didn't even know they had.
From a practical standpoint, how much power do you have in this situation? Are you actively looking for a job where you would find the working conditions more congenial? A lot of times in a subordinate - supervisor relationship, the sad truth is that it doesn't matter who's right. It's all about perceptions and who has, in the words of Seinfeld, "hand". If you need the job more than they need you, there is a limit to how much control you can have over your working conditions. If they need you more than you need the job, the conditions reverse.
I need my job more than they need me, although you might not know it from how I act sometimes. The truth is though that I'm unbelievably self-destructive.
Can you look around for other jobs, so that the power differential shifts a bit? Are you secure for the one year of your contract? Being an employee would give you a bit more leverage, probably.
Have you talked this over with your therapist? What does she think about it?
And sorry for being so d**n practical, Noa. I know how incredibly annoying that can be. It utterly enrages me when someone is like that with me. But I'm in rational mode this morning, and it's all I can offer.
But I'm sorry you're so unhappy with your work, and no matter how this situation works out, I don't think it could hurt to look around for other options. You've been unhappy here for a while.
poster:Dinah
thread:232354
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030604/msgs/232380.html