Posted by wendy b. on April 19, 2003, at 9:02:16
In reply to Uh oh., posted by kara lynne on April 19, 2003, at 0:04:53
> I lost it today and it could have been dangerous. I turned into an ass in response to an ass. I keep thinking life is supposed to be fair. I forget that when someone cuts you off on the road you should thank them and blow them kisses, or risk death. This guy had to work hard to pull as rude a maneuver as he did.
Uh oh is right! I am scared just thinking about it cuz: "This could be me." So many times. My former BF, now just regular BF (we're sorta back together after 2 yrs of being split) used to get so mad at me for starting stuff in bars or whatever... And it wasn't that I would engage in fisticuffs! or anything, I'm a nice person, it was something like a big oafish guy bumping into us in a semi-conscious state, and never turning around to say sorry, so I would say shit like: "Well! how 'bout 'Excuse me,' at least!" He would say, jesus, you're going to get us killed! don't you know people carry knives and guns, etc.
> So I honked.Well, shee-ite, I would have too!
> Then we entered a parking lot and he saw me walking by. He leaned out his window and started in on me. That did it-- the berating on top of the rudeness. He told me to "...come over here and..." (I don't know how not to make it obscene).
What could this mean? Come over here and what? If it's some sexual reference, ok, you might not want to say it, but jesus, that's pretty CRUDE of the guy...
>I think underneath it all I'm a fine person, and then this crazy woman comes out and gets into it with this guy.
And she started in on you too? (i.e., how did you know she was crazy too? or was it just guilt by association?) Of course, we all think you're a fine person...
> I had store security walk me back to my car and I left. I was so pissed at myself, and humiliated. I was as scummy as the guy was ( for engaging.Why? You didn't yell back at him, did you? You DID? Awwww...
Seriously, though. In the mood I was in yesterday, if the same thng had happened to me, I would have engaged, too. ("Don't f__ with me!")
>PMS, full moon, no impulse control. Later I kept thinking it was because I had nothing to look forward to. Would I have lost it so easily if I had something to look forward to? Not an excuse, just a thought.Something to look forward to? I guess I know what you mean, basically... Your initial post (which I just went back and re-read) says it all. I have felt all of those feelings, the disgust at optimism, the feeling of not belonging, the bitterness I feel at the world over certain infantile needs I have, that continue to go unfulfilled and unserviced...
yours,
W.
poster:wendy b.
thread:220209
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20030414/msgs/220585.html