Posted by fiona on April 26, 2002, at 15:02:15
I am so tired of everything. Some days (like today) life is such a struggle. I feel like the men in the slapstick movies who constantly push a heavy piano uphill, and just as they reach the top they lose their grip and they get run over. Is that all life is? Getting run over? Feels like it.
I just can't seem to get out of this hole, no matter how I try and I am sick of it. I feel like just as I see a way out the lid shuts on me and I'm trapped again. I hate myself for not being able to do it, other people seem to be able to sort out their problems and move on, why can't I? Maybe I don't try hard enough, maybe I don't care enough, maybe I'm just not a deserving person. My life seems to be slipping away from me and I have no control over it. I want it back, the way it used to be, when I had a path to follow and I was happy. I knew where my life was going, and it was good. Now it's a constant merry-go-round of worry and hurt and dissapointment. I am tired of it, I want it to stop.
poster:fiona
thread:22670
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020422/msgs/22670.html