Posted by beardedlady on March 27, 2002, at 6:11:12
In reply to Re: Sorry, still sad. « Zo, posted by Dr. Bob on March 26, 2002, at 18:45:37
Dinah:
I didn't think your post was "stinging" at all, nor did I feel you were pushing me away--as much as a person could push on an anonymous bulletin board! See, it goes both ways. If I am allowed to make a statement that you disagree with, then you are allowed to do the same. And neither of us is allowed to get our knickers in a bunch! If your post was judgmental, that stuff doesn't bother me a bit. If mine was, oh well. I am not Jesus (or Christian). I am judged; I judge. But I do adhere to the Golden Rule. And since I don't mind a little debate, I debate.
But there's the difference between us. I am full of self-confidence and esteem. It's not because I am stuck up or beautiful or exceptionally smart or wildly talented (though I am--hahahaha); it's that my parents instilled those things in me all my life. "They fuck you up/your mom and dad." Or they don't.
I guess I should have responded to this post sooner, but I didn't know just how sensitive you were.
Really, this is just a bulletin board of (mostly) well-meaning strangers. It's not exactly real life. These are not folks who are going to see you at the grocery store and day, "Ooh--there's Dinah. She's that sensitive chick from PSB!" Posts should not send you into a tizzy and make you cry! And if they do, I guess Zo is right, and you should take a break.
But our advice differs here: Don't even read the stuff--any of it. Because you'll be curious and want to read on in your threads, and not much will be there to stop you, and the cycle will continue.
And stop apologizing! You don't owe it to anyone except yourself.
I wish you luck and a good shot of ego.
beardy : )>
> > "You too beardy? I feel so sad for both of you. Where on earth do you meet people?"
> >
> > Dinah, sweetie, I felt and still feel this was rather a stinging post; it reads a bit condescending or judgemental.
> >
> > I know if someone said those two things to me, unless they were already a good friend, I'd feel pushed away by them. My guess is that you don't mean to, not at all. . .but often the tone of your posts, when I first "met" you, seemed to telegraph, Don't get close to me!
poster:beardedlady
thread:20951
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20020325/msgs/21004.html