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Re: But why? » Dinah

Posted by mair on December 4, 2001, at 12:18:56

In reply to But why?, posted by Dinah on December 4, 2001, at 8:07:31

> I've cut myself some in the past, like you not horribly badly, and there are times when the urge is so great that it feels that it takes an act of will not to do it now. What I tell myself is that whether or not there is a short term gain, it is not a positive direction for me. It seems to be enough for me to tell myself that it is a step backward, not the status quo or a step forward, and that I don't want to move backwards. It also makes me feel like I haven't evolved beyond adolescense. It's not always easy - I have had to force myself to try to get involved in some other activity, or leave the room where there are rozor blades, but for the last couple of years the fear of moving backwards has been sufficient.

Mair

Maybe also the shame ond embarrassment of telling my therapist. I could tell myself that I won't tell her, but I'm pretty sure it would get out. She does know that the urge is sometimes there.


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