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Re: siblings » sar

Posted by shelliR on December 4, 2001, at 0:31:37

In reply to siblings, posted by sar on December 3, 2001, at 14:33:32

> i used to be somewhat puzzled that my mother very rarely communicated with her 6 brothers and sisters.
>
> recently, my sister and i have come to a conlusion to stop communicating with each other, and so have my brother and i (i am the middle child).
>
> at this age, i find it disheartening to see these breaks...yet i like myself (wow!) more than i like them; i'm just envious of all the siblings i see hanging out together...afterall, my brother is only a year younger than i am, and i wish i could get him to ome out of his shell and come hang...but my drinking and "bipolarity" scare him, he can't deal with me, and i suppose i can't deal with is square ideals and quietness, it just scares me that i can relate to neither...
>
> how is your relationship with your siblings?

Hey Sar,

Just because your relationship with your siblings is on hold right now, that can change. They will always be part of your life, at least as long as your parents are alive. So you all all have some time to bring things closer.

My brother and I don't have a relationship and that doesn't upset me but it does upset my parents. My sister and I would never pick each other as friends, but when things go wrong, both of us are there for each other and that feels good.


WIth your brother, I can understand why you scare him now; you scare yourself sometimes, remember? But how about doing something safe with him, doing something where you can both be sort of quiet and just get used to each other again. There are quiet things you like to do--could you go hiking or go to a movie, something very low key to start. A sibling doesn't have to be a best friend for them to be valuable to you in your life. I think when I don't expect a lot from the relationship with my sister, but keep it going, than we do better together.

take care,

Shelli


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