Posted by Greg A. on November 20, 2001, at 16:38:34
In reply to emotions dulled or backbone grown?, posted by sar on November 20, 2001, at 14:27:06
Sar,
First let me say that, from what I have read on this board you write with a definite talent and style. So don’t let one narcissist’s wrong opinion change you. (He must be a somewhat insecure narcissist as well, to be trying to bring you down)
It’s okay to throw out all that stuff. One theory is that you should never re-read journals and the like. They are for the present only; to speak whatever you have held inside, or to try to make sense of jumbled thoughts.
When I was (more) crazy a couple of years ago, I believed, in an obsessive way, that this tall, blond, younger female was the answer to my misery. (When we are distressed and hurt it’s very common and natural to find someone who will reflect just what we want to see) I wrote long letters to her. I poured out my feelings and insecurities. I eventually realized she was just a regular mixed up lady, with faults and problems of her own and one who had little understanding of what I felt or needed. I threw out every scrap I had saved from that time. I tossed things in anger at first, and then later in relief. I felt no need to keep any of it. It signified both an end to a period in my life and a willingness to look to the future.
What you did is to acknowledge that the past is over; and while not totally forgotten, it is the lessons learned which you take from that time and not all the details. That’s a very human thing to do.Keep on writing
Greg
poster:Greg A.
thread:14125
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20011117/msgs/14127.html