Posted by shelliR on July 17, 2001, at 16:10:25
In reply to Re: Did my job define me?, posted by Shar on July 16, 2001, at 22:33:55
Hi Greg,
I am also a workaholic, but then again, most people who start their own businesses are. I think how we spend our time does help define us to ourselves. Work is not always just a job. It can be accomplishment, creativity, relationships, challenges, crises, commitment, etc. If you have been working for most of your time, it is absolutely natural for you to feel a great sense of loss right now.
I hope that you can separate ego (losing your job) from loss. If I lost my business right now, I would totally lose my bearings because it is at the core of my life (family, for me did not work out to be that core, but for some people it is). I know I am the type that puts total energy into everything that I do (and so I don't do a lot of different things). So you just have all this energy bouncing around right now. The next step for me would be to figure out where I want to next put my energy. You've talked in one thread about working on your relationship with your wife. This may (or may not) be the time to do that. This could be a time where you set out to learn something that you didn't have the time to delve into before. Since you have the kind of put everything in it energy, you might want to take a workshop in something. They're always intense, and you learn a lot in a very short time. Or taking the time to plan what would be your perfect next job, and somehow work toward creating it.
If you got a lot of satisfaction in life from your job, I wouldn't overanalyze it into a bad thing. You do have the time to discover if you want to approach your time in the same way, or change (i.e., commit yourself to working less hours in your next position). You will regain your sense of self, and new opportunities will present themselves in the future.
And as Shar said, get yourself into therapy so you get the opportunity to talk and talk and talk about this.
all the best,
Shelli
poster:shelliR
thread:7503
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010717/msgs/7552.html