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Well said ;o) no post » AKC

Posted by yo-wazzzup on June 26, 2001, at 15:01:41

In reply to Re: Houston Tragedy- I just have to comment, posted by AKC on June 26, 2001, at 13:23:28

> I just got back from lunch with a couple of coworkers where this came up. And what has been spinning round and round in my mind has to come out. I'm thankful that I have a safe place like this to share.
>
> There has been so much written already, so many stories on tv, so much spin put on this story. Who is to blame? The only answer is everyone and no one. Obviously this poor woman is very, very ill. While I hate the sterotypes the lawyer was trying to conjure, he was somewhat right when he said that this mother had to be "out of her mind" to do this.
>
> The thing is that we are trying to understand the impossible. Some people say she shouldn't have had another kid if she suffered from post-partum depression. But I would venture to guess that many, many a mother have had many kids after having suffered post-partum depression. Maybe the father worked too much. I don't know. He was a white collar government worker - a lot of them get to go home at five. And I know a lot of dads who have to work a lot to support their families but do alright by them (I have a brother who is my biggest hero, though I just worry to death he will work himself into a grave trying to be the best he can be to his kids, but working as hard as he does to support his family). They were homeschooling. A mistake with her depression? Again, hindsight - easy call. Again, I'm sure we can find many examples of where it works.
>
> I shared last week about the secretary who made some remark about the meds - and my brief comment that it had nothing, absolutely nothing to do with the meds. I don't know. How can I say that? For most of these meds, researchers are not even sure how they work. This message board is a great example on how one med can effect so many people so many different ways.
>
> I think one very important result should occur from all of this. That more research, more dollars into research, must occur into the causes and cures of mental illness. Because we don't know exactly what causes it (was it a genetic disposition in this mother's case? environment? a trauma?), it is almost impossible to predict, and therefore almost impossible to prevent. It is so easy to look at this tragedy and pick out all these signs and now say look, you "should have known." Yeah, and a lot of people should have seen my suicide attempt coming a couple of years ago and didn't. It's what we do going forward, not looking back, that will really count.


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