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Re: More questions ???

Posted by Anna Laura on June 19, 2001, at 5:47:13

In reply to More questions ???, posted by Willow on June 18, 2001, at 19:26:14

> I'm probably on the same wave-length as Cheetah regarding answers, but then I have to believe what I hear to acknowledge it. Does that make any sense?
>
> I think finally after three years I'm starting to rethink some "myths" I've had about myself, and this has probably occured because of something the psychologist has said. But am I just substituting someone else's view of "me" for another's?
>
> If a person has had long-term depression/anxiety problems what are the goals of therapy?
>
> How much do you pay for therapy?
>
> I'm starting to really wonder if the financial costs of these meds plus the therapy are worth it?
>
> Willow


I think that with long term depression/anxiety the best thing to do it's changing old thinking habits. I believe that thoughts might be actually a cage.
I say so because i experienced that myself.
Last year i eventually managed to change my old thinking habits (too long to tell how i managed to do that). It was an abrupt change. It was like my mental visual had grown larger and larger. It was pleasant at first, 'cause for the first time in ten years i started to believe that switching thoughts/habits was the right path to get out of the depression labyrinth .
The point i' m trying to make is that i realized with dismay how much scared i was to dump depression and to proceed without it. I always thought it was my strongest desire, It was like peeling all my skin off and feeling like s*** instead.
I got scared as hell, i wasn't prepared to this i guess;
I swear to god i never felt so vulnerable in my whole life.
Unfortunately, i had to endure major stresses while i was so vulnerable. The outcome was a
bout of major depression last fall.
Another strange thing that occured to me was that while i was experiencing tha second bout of depression at its early stages i felt somehow better (not feeling anhedonic that much, sex life improved and so on). It was like i opened up both to pleasure and pain.
It's weird : it was like tearing off an old baind-aid, the skin underneath was soft and very vulnerable. Depression has become part of me: it was like my armour.


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poster:Anna Laura thread:6465
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010611/msgs/6543.html