Posted by susid on December 28, 2008, at 1:57:22
In reply to Re: HELP, a married man and I have fallen in love, posted by sassyfrancesca on May 9, 2008, at 10:03:30
I think most of the answers to this question show a lack of maturity or understanding about one of the most complex things as humans we are ever faced with - relationships. I can only relate my own experience.
I was the guy in a situation where I was married but was in love and loved by a girl 20 years younger than me.
We both did not want to hurt anyone but we were both very much genuinely in love - she did not see me as a sugar daddy
or father replacement and I did not see her as some young chick to have some sexual fun with -or someone for me to cheat
with.My relationship with my wife had changed gradually over time in a negative way - we had been married 18 years and people change - we changed, both of us and were no longer were compatible in our feelings for each other.
I met a lovely girl and we fell in love and found that despite our age differences we were compatible - I was very worried that she would feel the age difference was to much or that I was married to complicated - but that was not the case.
Her friends had concerns until they met me and observed us together and they also agreed we were good for each other.People cannot help how they feel about each other - love is one of the most powerful forces there is. As one post mentioned
you have to talk to your partner and think about what do you really want - how do you both genuinely feel about each other.Comments like "once a cheater always a cheater" are not helpful - and are saying once someone fall in love and marries someone they cannot ever have there feeling change and should be incapable of loving someone else?
In my own case she was 19 when I met her and we fell in love when she was 20 - we were together for 3 years but it
was a long distance relationship and because of this and other pressures it did not last but we remain to this day the best of friends.
poster:susid
thread:769998
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/relate/20071110/msgs/871124.html