Posted by Dinah on January 18, 2012, at 19:03:53
In reply to Re: update, posted by paisleygirl on January 18, 2012, at 17:10:26
Well, I don't see any evidence pointing to evil. Not in what you've said.
Do you see where your anger with her might have caused you to behave in ways that, according to what she told you, would end in her terminating your therapy? I think it's normal enough, when someone gives an ultimatum, not to want to comply. But when you don't, the result is that you won't have that person in your life.
Maybe you could think about it this way. She gave you an ultimatum. You deliberately cancelled future appointments with the DBT therapist without first discussing it with your pdoc. You then sent her an unprecedented communication that might be expected to confirm her fears that she's out of her depth, without the additional help of a DBT team. In effect, you arranged for her to leave you. You rejected a pdoc who gave you an ultimatum, and by doing so appeared to put conditions on her caring. You took actions to effectively leave your pdoc.
So... What do you do now? ER sounds like a good option to me. You don't currently have a treatment team and you might find one there. You would be making a decision to help yourself find providers you prefer to the ones you had.
I once heard Marsha Linehan say that her patients were often thought manipulative by others. When the reality is that we all want to have our needs met, and behave in ways that we hope will achieve that end. Her patients just weren't very good at it.
What are your goals at this point? What do you want in the way of a treatment team? What would you like from Babble? What are the best ways to get it?
Your pdoc is telling you that there's no way you can feel bad enough for her to take you back as a client. What doors would you like to see open? Can we help you problem solve to achieve your goals? Or at least some of them?
We'd all like to be loved unconditionally. But in reality that may not be a realistic goal.
I really do urge you to contact the ER. It seems a sensible course of action for you at this point.
poster:Dinah
thread:1007661
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20111220/msgs/1007705.html