Posted by twinleaf on February 21, 2009, at 22:37:28
In reply to Re: a follow-up- the last one!, posted by HappyChaiTea on February 21, 2009, at 21:58:39
It's hard to imagine what he may have been thinking. I don't think he would have been able to make his behavior look anywhere near normal or acceptable in front of that committee, and he probably knew that.
Basically, you are following the same route I did- I did it with the local chapter of the American Psychoanalytic Association. It did not take a lot of time, and I felt that I was treated fairly and respectfully. They were obviously trying to do the same for him.
I am very glad I did it. I waited until my anger and outrage had calmed down, and I feel that what is being asked of him by the ethics committee is appropriate, and even necessary. He could well do the same thing to other vulnerable patients. What he did to me falls under the category of emotional abuse- an uncommon area for complaints; what happened to you falls more under the area of sexual boundary violations, I think.
My "new" t has helped the most just by being a witness. He wants me to tell him as many times as I need to how hurt and rejected I felt- as well as how angry and disillusioned. He said it can be thousands of times, until I no longer need to. He really doesn't even remind me that I'm not at fault, because his eyes, demeanor and intense listening ability tell me that without words.
Your T is right- even coming on to a therapist. if you had done that, and enjoying his sexual interest in you, is not wrong at all. If a therapist is able to handle it skillfully, it can even be a tremendous asset in changing and growing.