Posted by lucie lu on February 20, 2009, at 11:36:04
In reply to Need help answering T's question...need info., posted by AMF on February 18, 2009, at 21:25:11
> A few years ago a child ran in front of my car and was killed. I told my T about this and how I felt about taking a life. T asked me what I lost. I know I have never been the same but I am looking for any information about taking another's life (other than in war). I can't seem to come up with my loss in the whole thing and nobody talks about killing someong.
That is awful, and I'm so sorry. If it were me, I would certainly have profound feelings of loss. One would be, as another poster put it, the abrupt loss of the feelings of safety and order in the world. IMO that is enough for even the stoutest of us to have trouble with. To be able to live our lives, we all have to deal with, or studiously ignore, the fact that life can end suddenly and unexpectedly. To be confronted by that in the way that you have is indeed a major loss. You have no choice but to deal with it, because you have experienced it first-hand, where most people haven't. In many, such an experience may precipitate a crisis in faith, which also may be a loss if that is an important part of your life. For nearly everyone who goes through an experience of this magnitude, there will be a compelling need to answer the question "why?," which of course is difficult to answer or unanswerable.
I would guess that PTSD might be the closest to what you're experiencing. This is the sort of PTSD element that you hear over and over again from survivors who have lived through battle, disasters, genocides etc. Everyone's experience is somewhat different, but many of the responses are the same nonetheless.
My heart goes out to you.
Lucie
poster:lucie lu
thread:880992
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090214/msgs/881307.html