Posted by fleeting flutterby on January 24, 2009, at 18:44:31
In reply to Least favorite words/phrases from therapists., posted by Dinah on January 24, 2009, at 13:15:17
The psychologist I used to see was an "in your face" type therapist. Seemed to me that he said things for the "shock" factor. and here I am.... quiet, never showing my emotions, struggling with the inability to be attached emotionally to anyone, horribly lacking self-esteem....
one day as I tried to defend myself about it being so hard for me to feel important... he said--
"You are not getting me caught in your web"..... (huh?- i thought) .... I'm sure he didn't see the devastating hurt in my heart as I sat there shocked-- with no clue what he meant by such a statement. it felt like a mind game he was playing with me and... Mind games are a HUGE huge trigger as that's what my mother did all the time with us kids-- the one that could decifer her "game" at any one moment was the one that got her attention. I totally shut down then and it became increasingly harder each session to feel safe.......
another thing my former T. once said to me-- which also triggered me was....
"You are more like your mother than you realize"....
argh!!! my mother is an abusive attention seeking narcissist...... I never seek attention, I would never abuse a small child and I so worry how everyone else feels that I totally deny my own self.
i think he might of meant that I run from relationships like my mother does-- but-- the way he said it -- it sure stung. :o(
since then-- my new T. has NEVER ever said such things-- in fact she has even said the total opposite. ah... it sure feels nice to feel safe with a T.flutterby-mandy
poster:fleeting flutterby
thread:875827
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20090109/msgs/875936.html