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Re: I got a letter from my T! ;-( » LadyBug

Posted by raisinb on July 14, 2008, at 14:57:45

In reply to I got a letter from my T! ;-(, posted by LadyBug on July 14, 2008, at 13:47:57

Ladybug, I'm so sorry. That was a crappy letter. It must have been difficult to learn about her retirement if you had some hopes of working things out with her (and why didn't she tell you before this? in my experience major changes like this should be told to the client as soon as the T knows. I wonder if it was a sudden decision? If so, maybe she is going through something personally, which also fits to her out-of-character and inappropriate reaction to the adoption).

Anyway, FWIW, here is what I would do: I wouldn't go back. I'd find another T ASAP to help me work through the hurt attending the ending with this T. There is a lot to be processed here, and even if she were objective (which doesn't seem like the case), your current T wouldn't have time to do it with you before December. Once you have processed everything you will be able to salvage all the good in that relationship--sounds like there was so much--and take it with you.

But you know, if you can't leave it hanging, you can't, and nothing is going to change your feelings about that.

And of course I'm being kind of hypocritical here. Many people have urged me to leave my therapist. And I keep going back. It's impossible to know from the outside what that connection is, and what it means to you. This was such an important relationship in your life. If it demands more sessions, you can't argue with that need.


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poster:raisinb thread:839683
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