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Re: My therapist thinks my situation is hopeless Dinah

Posted by raisinb on July 7, 2008, at 16:18:37

In reply to My therapist thinks my situation is hopeless, posted by Dinah on July 7, 2008, at 11:48:52

Dinah, that is a terrible situation. It doesn't sound like your therapist thinks your situation is hopeless, but rather like he doesn't want you to risk more of your finances and well-being trying to fix the situation.

I know it's hard not to feel responsible for a parent, especially one who's not quite competent--and for some reason, people often feel more responsible for abusive caregivers than they do for others. But I agree with your therapist and the others. There doesn't seem to be any more you can do here. And even if you can, would it help in the long run? Would your efforts fix the situation, or even make it a little bit better? Wouldn't your mother resist more, forget more deadlines?

It sounds like you've exhausted all the potential help there is. You can hire services who send people to check in with her once or twice a week (my family does it for my grandmother, who has Alzheimer's). If your mother won't accept it, though, then what can you do? Honestly, this might be harsh, but it sounds like a big part of her just doesn't want help and will sabotage any efforts.

I'm sorry you are having to go through this. It just sounds impossible.





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