Posted by Amanda29 on April 25, 2008, at 20:18:22
My therapist has decided to teach me autonomy ..and being my own person. But, he is doing so by stopping all communication with me via phone and email, and has told me that he cannot show me grace and mercy..that I have to find that elsewhere through other people...the kicker is that I have no one. My family cannot be the ones to show me ...and I dont have many friends. He was being the one to "lift me up" and tell me he was proud of me...but now all of a sudden he is stopping. He told me months ago that one of his goals in our sessions was to show me grace....and now he is dropping everything he said. I am crushed. I feel lost and alone and confused and scared.
Just yesterday we met and we were talking about how I am 29 years old and yet I have the emotional maturity of a 2 to 4 year old. That made me feel great. That is part of the reason why I dont have many friends I guess. But, he cannot just get me started thinking about these things and then leave me and stop all communication.
I have severe issues of abandonment because I was abandoned as a baby and so for him to leave me like this really freaks me out. THEN he compares me to his children a six year old and a nine year old ..and that felt GREAT.
I know that ultimately he is trying to help me but I cannot see the good in this. And I have until next thursday to become overly confused ...but I am pretty much there already.
I dont look at him as my friend, I dont look at him as anything except as my therapist...and he is a fantastic therapist...but I have been with him for going on 4 years now and this is the first time I have felt abandoned.
I dont know what to do..and I have severe depression and I know that I am going to become depressed between now and next week...and I just cannot handle this.
I dont know what to do.
poster:Amanda29
thread:825498
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20080423/msgs/825498.html