Posted by Dory on October 30, 2007, at 7:52:28
i am not sorry. Some people are sick of me and my main issue. There is an expression where i am from "tough t*t." (it comes from the instances where a suckling animal choses an unproductive or "tough" teat, so the phrase means the same basically as touch luck for you, life ain't fair, too bad, etc)
it's hurtful when i find out stuff like that. i'm doing the best that i can. It's been 6yrs of increasing problems with the last 3 being a nightmare. i'm broken down. My T says i need to talk about this as much as possible with people so that i can start to believe in myself...and so i am going to continue... no apologies.
today is better in the sense that i don't feel suicidal or quite as much self-hatred. i am disoriented and having trouble getting daily stuff done. i am deeply depressed.
i have called T twice and both times he has been magnificant. Very gentle and supportive. He helps remind me why i am doing this and he told me that **anyone** in my situation would find it intolerable and would **need** to make the same choices. JUst hearing his voice, especially in gentle mode, is very reassuring.
poster:Dory
thread:792314
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20071022/msgs/792314.html